AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Tarot for May 03, 2009
DATE: 05/03/2009 06:28:43
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Every now and again I’m compelled to see what the daily Tarot has to offer. As always, my attachment to the mystical and spiritual Draw me to such things. Todays seemed to call to me, so I heeded that call. For curiousities sake.

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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Comatose~
DATE: 03/23/2009 16:34:33
STATUS: publish
BODY:

In the mortal world
it would be seen as depression.
To a vampire it is much more
starvation
cerebral suicide
a subdued and darkened dawning
fractured
colorless
Drifting across
a struggling consciousness,
as wearily I awaken
and prepare to go where one must go,
to do what one must do to survive.
At this time,
I am left alone to drift,
barely alive, to wander like a ghost,
Morose
melancholy
dwelling in the funereal gloom
of dark places,
seeking out some spectral response,
some burst of brilliance instead of
all this grey, shadow and sludge,
Mundane
Ordinarily Plain
seeking the joys of chromaticity,
the stolen light of the golden day,
and suddenly finding it on the wall.
As startling as discovering gold;
this realization that hope survives,
the rapture of a rich, red reflection
splashed in ruby-scalloped waves,
Why does my heart bleed
But my mind remain static?
focused
unchanging
Why is it that I kneel before You
With my eyes downcast
As I feel Your grip in raven strands
pulling at my tangled hair?
subdued
surrendered
Such questions arise, like acidic vapors
in the night
constricting upon my lungs;
choking
Tightening that terrible knot
within my chest
that twists savagely
With every gasping breath.
Blatantly Sexual
Most effectual
Obsessive
The answers; of course
natural
unadulterated
inborn
inherent
I act comatose and languid
when we are apart
people think me foolish and dumbstruck
I am not such

But I ask….

What window of horrors will shatter?
What wretched demons so foul will arise through the cracks
And envelop my mind and soul?
I am not as stupid as they think
I do not lack judgement and they fear my actions
They see me as…
Dangerous
Wary
Scary
Anything but Ordinary
I am not ordinary…
of course.
I am…
different…
designed…
Honed.
I love you, Master.
I always will
I understand Your harshness
more so now, than ever.
You do it
because You love me
You do this to me
to build my strength
As I kneel before You
I know
that You are always proud of me
And love me
as I love You.
I will always be part of you
I will always be
completely in sync
with everything that you do.
I will feel your pulse
from the deepest of depths
And feel you tighten
with shortened breaths.
as you feast mechanically
upon the world around you
We will remain
in this union of souls
Forevermore.
Comatose.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: I need you
DATE: 03/19/2009 10:09:27
STATUS: publish
BODY:

I come to you
With my free will
And it pleases you
I need you
To bind me
To protect me
To see me

I come to you
And kneel at your feet
And it pleases you
I need you
To punish me
To bruise me
To shackle me

I come to you
submitting myself
And it pleases you
I need you
To praise me
To soothe me
To free me from myself

I need the pain to forget.
I need to forget the pain.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Sins of the Flesh
DATE: 01/11/2009 19:52:38
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Borne unto this world
to wander.
Drawn..drawing.
Wanting…wanted.
Seeking and sought.

Harboring a vacancy
that plagues from within.

A bond.
centuries deep.

Intangable memories-
felt; not viewed.
Caressing a soul
with a spiritual touch,
that drifts in a swirl of
haze.

Flickering thoughts.
Wicked things….
Addiction.
Affliction.
Consumption.

Intensifying preternatural hungers;
An overwhelming COMPULSION
to feed upon the offerances
that abound.

The permiating scent of arousal.
The lure of flesh;
a sensual tease.

The crook of a finger,
the beckon of a smile,
as predator now becomes the prey.

They understand, not….
What we think.
How we think.

They could not.

Yet…

Learned behaviors.
Try to mimic; to fulfill desire.
Grasping at what they could never be.

They bend.
They sway…
and mold to the image
which they most seek.

Like silk spun wings
of Heterocera…..
They Flicker- then burst to flame
as they follow; blind
into the Pyre.

For us…

There is no conscience;
no frail miseries.

We’ve taken by subtlety the innocent
and those not so- by their own vanity.

We’ve fed; bled dry,
And laid waste
to the very string of insanity.

We’ve drawn blood;
watched it pour.
Stained pale flesh
a crimson hue.

Savored in the writhing torment of our victims;
Appalled and enthralled,
enraged and subdued.

Played them at our beck and cue.
We’ve Amused
and entertained
this inner rage of lust that knows no border

And we tell them all,
as darkness falls;
when their final breaths are taken.
“Fear not.
For you are not dying
and you will not die,
you will live on…
Inside me.”

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Those Deadly Sins….
DATE: 11/28/2008 09:21:59
STATUS: publish
BODY:

There’s Anger and Greed
and Pride is a must,
then Sloth and Envy
And Gluttony and Lust.

These total seven.
“They’re vices”… They say-
“They’ll keep you from heaven
Plead as you may.”

Crave the temptation.
To lust it is bound.
Pray for a redemption,
that will never be found.

Fall then ‘pon earth,
and to bended knee.
This truly is mirth,
as you’ll clearly see.

Within this prose I do share;
a secret untold.
Lean close if you dare,
be you so bold.

This secret I’ll tell you,
should not be a shock.
My words will consume you,
in this I’ll take stock.

The seven you’ve skirted;
you thought you were clear.
So with me you’ve flirted,
with nary a fear.

But surely you knew..
with each breath you took.
Your choices were few.
Your foundation shook.

For this is your fate.
You knew it within.
Curiousity I’ll sate…..

I’m the eighth deadly sin

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——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: the redemption of Sin
DATE: 11/11/2008 18:17:41
STATUS: publish
BODY:

In Case Yahoo is being its usual ornery self….

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kN1jd94YPvw

Lead me to the holy vineyard.
Spread my form
beneath the rungs
of the wind-machine ladder.

Lay me naked upon the Earth.
Let the voyeur moon
View me; open.
Breasts heaving with desire.

Let the breeze dance across bare skin.
Let cleansing rain
sanctify my flesh
with the promise of exaltation.

Lift me then and carry me within.
Stained glass windows
reflecting a kaleidoscope
of colored moonlight across the floor.

Lewd thoughts; the purgatory of potential…
bring me to this passion’s altar.
The strike of match and sulfers glow.
Prostrate acolyte waiting for redemption.

Light of candles; flickering flames,
small halo’s; glimmering hues,
give way to the scent of spent wax,
within the dank stone walls of the holy house.

Let darkness coat me
as I lay upon this cold hard stone.
Arms outstretched in supplication.
My offerance of sacrifice to you.

Time burns unnoticed, except by candle’s death.
Until at last I hear the whisper
of cloth against cloth
And I know you are behind me; watching; weighing.

Your murmur; soft like that of dark crushed velvet.
The rasp of your breathy growl
raises fine hairs along my flesh.
That murmur barely discernable but clearly understood.

My own reply; softer than your spoken directive to me.
But unneeded in the face of that which I offer
for your delight and mine as well.
I bid you to take, to claim, to taste.

I am a devout disciple of your Mastery.
You accept my coming sins in priestly silence.
Grant me exculpation for what I’m about to spill.
Lay pennance binding my soul; eternally yours.

Bless me, Father, for I would sin.

I beg you; probe the scriptures of my flesh.
Sculpt me with the sharpest blade.
Soil my chalice with your seed and my blood.
Sex with you is my religion.

Anoint me, Father, for I must sin.

Through the ecstacy of pleasure and the agony of pain,
I beg your marks upon my flesh.
For in their crimson welted rise,
lies the only true path to rapture.

Crucify me, Father, for I shall sin.

Drug me with your Dominance-
Baptise me, redeem me,
Give me your Opiate.
Make me an Oracle.

Assure my salvation and condemn me,
Beat me with your sacred tools.
Make me your protege; your minion.
A writhing, aching, needing, spiritual whore.

Fuck me with your absolution.
Penetrate me with my penalty.
Then, let me beg and plead
for Your torture.

Consume me, Father, for… I… am… Sin.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: The Unspoken….
DATE: 10/25/2008 09:41:49
STATUS: publish
BODY:

You feed…
Revel in the rage,
embrace it,
amplify it.
Stir that Beast within..
into the churning pitch
of Abysmal Hell.

Intoxicated insatiability.
Salivating.
Chomping.
Nostril flaring.
Primally driven
hunger.

Exterior
Cool
Calm
Collective
Always in control

That charming
Luring smile,
that conceals
what lies beneath.
What resides
in your very core.

I close my eyes
and watch from within.
I breathe
the essence of you.
Filling my lungs.
Feeling you.
Just knowing.

Yesss…
I do know.
I feel.
I see.
Things we never speak of.
The unspoken
that simply ….
exists.

That thirst
I arouse in you.
Acute awareness.
Pounding.
Throbbing.
Thudding.
Within you.

And The blood
shall sing to the blood,
and Death
shall have no Domain.

As it has been fated…
from the inception of time.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Human….Remember?
DATE: 09/23/2008 16:33:25
STATUS: publish
BODY:

If I were an animal, what would I be ?

This question I considered
Then pondered Briefly

The thought I gave….
Deliberately,
Purposefully,
Reasonably.

Yes, Human…
Remember?

So oft forgotten
just what we are – I am…

Human…
Remember?

The darkness
hidden deep inside.
That takes these hurtful things in stride
That smirks and leers;
a crooked smile
Plotting deeply all the while
Against those that think
they touch or know;
the depths that “I” as a being go
to stroke the recesses
abscessing within
that festers and grows – my other skin.

Human…
Remember…

Dreams
Shattered and smashed
Souls
slashed and gashed
Hearts
hooked and torn asunder

Maniacal dreams
of empowering schemes
that kill
anything
and take
everything

Human…
Remember…

“Childe Of Night…”

Cry of the Vampire;
A blood curdling shriek
Crimson tears
over ivory cheek

A drawing of sorts
A Kinship shared
a nuzzle a nip
Low growl-throat bared
the grazing of teeth
upon flesh so fair
chewing though people
with nary a care

jaws close
TIGHT.
Warm-wetness flowing –
a spraying of vitae
sates hunger thats growing

Human…
Remember?

Taste…drink deep
within fertile mind
Then sleep. Yes, Sleep
For tomorrow will find
There is nothing special
no super power
a human.. nothing more
A flavor of the hour
Not invincable
and not bullet-proof
these thoughts it seems
nothing more than a spoof

now read this again
without all the vanity
herein lies the humor
laden with insanity
I wrote this for me
that seems to be true
but look once again
the story is …YOU

Human.

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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: The Sound of Silence….
DATE: 09/04/2008 10:28:00
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Have you ever woken up one morning and asked yourself… “What the FUCK was I thinking??”

Just so you know, I do enough of that… for you.

Some days you just cant find a good scene, conversation, game, play, show, … Some days… its just ….Silent.

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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: A blast from the past… or is it the present?
DATE: 08/03/2008 05:58:40
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Carly Simon Lyrics
Jesse Lyrics
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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: One Lone Howl….
DATE: 07/23/2008 20:11:42
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Deathly silent
as a ghostlike form
slinks
prowling
through the obscure gloom.
Plush pelt;dark as night;
Lustrous ebony strands
shimmering with a silken sheen

Orbs of emerald
glow incandescent
from the shadows.
Lifting a solemn gaze heavenward,
peering to flickering stars,
which dot the velvety black canvas
of the earthen night.

Silken and warm
a crystalline tear
slips down
the soft swell of a cheek.
Glistening trickle
catching the moons light.
Reflecting a rainbow
In a pool of sadness.

Mournful memories,
of yesterday
gripping at her chest.
Squeezing the air
from expanded lungs,
as fertile mind recalls
the frolicking of days gone by.

In tune with the glowing sphere
hung upon the blackness of the night sky.
Powerful insite
expressing feelings…
A dance in Moon-Light
A Symphony of Pain
An Orchestra of Misery:
A Rhythm in the Rain

Bathing in the full glory.
Basking in lunar rays.
Exposed
to all that dwells in the darkness.

One lone howl…
doleful,
plaintive,
somber,
breaking the silence of the night
as it lifts
to the stretch
of the moon’s glow.
A beast of the night,
remembers its love.

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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Alpha Male
DATE: 06/15/2008 08:01:13
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Deep within my core,
I can feel
the heat.
flames
flickering
within my soul.

closing my eyes..
The storm surge begins to fill me
churning through my mind;
soaking the grey matter
with a promise of
desire
lust
passion.

The raging
internal
hunger
consuming my mind;
heightening my senses.
Flames burning white hot
inside of me.

From my belly
churning
surging
Liquid fire, flows;
molten lava
through my veins.

My arousal
wrapping itself around you.
Feeding you
nourishing;
strengthening that Beast within
awakening it
with the scent of
bitch in heat.

Your searing gaze
summons the animal inside me.
A beast
wanton
needy
responding to the sound
of your
silver tongue
sending curls of
Heat through my nearly writhing form

You know- You are the only one
that can
entice
coax
direct
that savage hunger;
that can grasp it
in the slow burn of your hands.

You coil your fingers
in my hair.
Like binding vines.
Using that grip
to position me
Precisely where you’ll
Be able to sheathe
Yourself to the hilt.

No resistance….
My spine contracts; arching.
Reflex
instinct
primal need
rocking hips upward
as moist cunt
tips to your view.

If I had a tail it would
curve around my body
offering you entry
To me.

You know…
You know you have me,
Alpha male
You didn’t have to
Fight for me
I came
willingly
freely
voluntarily.

Like an animal,
instinct dictated
that only the strongest;
only the most
genetically superior
could claim the she beast
for his own.

The silence of the ether
broken;
shattered.
Sounds of rut permiating the air
beastial
primal
savage
instinctual,
this need… to breed.

No mercy
in this brutal claiming.
The burn of your length filling me
Pouring my orgasm onto you
over and over again.

The grip of your fist in my hair,
twisting my head
to see
what the havoc, of taking me,
Has done to you.

A transformation;
a releasing
of that Beast
within you.

Ebony eyes;
incandescent gaze
with a maniacal glow,
searing; burning into my soul.

Fingers splay upon my hip
curling
raking
welting
sweat dampened
ivory flesh.
Gripping to control
the depth and tempo
of your penetration.
Deeper.
Deeper.
Making me take all of you
full force.

A headlong spiral
as body gives
to your taking.
Scents and sounds
filling the void.
The wet suck
of my cunt
around your thrusting cock;
fucking me.

The press of the roundness
of my ass
back against you;
driving you deeper still.

Wedge yourself
inside me;
lock
within that elastic ring.

Free it.
Free the beast within.
Spill that
molten
heated
seed, within my core.

Breed.
Mate.
Procreate.
Pour the heat
from deep inside of you,
into me.

Alpha male..
stake your claim.
Make me drink you
deep within.
Your territory;
marked.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Fly With Me Tonight
DATE: 06/04/2008 11:21:49
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Come, my love
Let the dark scent of my desire
Envelope you
Arouse you
Intoxicate you
Fill you

Together
We will ride the wings of the night
Soaring
Flying
Singing
In abject glee

Have audience with spirits.
Speaking in undiscovered tongues
Murmurs
Whispers
Susurrations
A peek into the future

We will speak
Of the plants and the rocks.
Nature
Creation
Cosmos
Lifetimes beyond.

Together
We will light the Fires of Hell
Deviance
Depravity
Lunacy
Our playgrounds to explore

Your voice stirs
The churning hunger within me
Thirst
Lust
Need
Drawing me … Beyond the Abyss

Gather me in your dark embrace
The kind of darkness I dream of
Ache for
Long for
Desire
And in the end I shall know…only you.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: This I know….
DATE: 05/31/2008 09:47:56
STATUS: publish
BODY:

When the sun sets beyond the horizon,
And Darkness surrounds this place.
When the moon shines no light.
He will come for me.

When the sands of the desert,
blow; biting across the land.
When the seas churn murky black.
He will come for me.

When in the eerie pitch of night,
nary a sound be heard.
When all creatures flee in fear.
He will come for me.

When the static and buzz stop,
within the metropolis.
When Power to all is lost.
He will come for me.

When Lightening flashes,
and thunder cracks.
When rain torrents upon the earth.
He will come for me.

When the clock ticks its second hand,
upon that predestined hour.
When time as I know it stands still
He will come for me.

When the crop whistles,
and the whip snaps.
When leather footfall draws near.
He will come for me

When knees buckle,
and body aches.
When souls unite in reverie.
He will come for me.

So here it is written, for those that question,
Why I wait….Endlessly.
Simply because … I know.
He will come for me.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Hunger
DATE: 05/15/2008 11:09:42
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Heart beat….

Dull thud
Auditorily resounding
Pulsing
Pounding
Pushing through my body
With each slow inhaled breath.

Fledgeling
Watching
Learning
Hunger growing
Veins flowing
With the blood of a Toreador.

Created for sin
Molded in His desire
Taught; with controlled guidance
Lucidity
Apathy
Disdain
These things that make us, us;
Vampires

Here for
Seduction
Destruction
Your ultimate malfunction.

Designed each
As a complimentary
Extension of power to the other

Here
To Fuck your mind
And leave you
Aching
Wanting
Needing

More.

See our sardonic smile
As you
Beg
Plead
Bargain with
Your very soul
For the most fleeting of contact.

Feel the darkness;
Hunger for it
Revel in it
Feel the addiction
Love us
Hate us
Want to be with us
Want to… BE… us.
We are your mental heroin

You are, poor piteous beings
Hooked
Blinded
Mystified
Awed

Food.

Come now
Line yourselves up
Become an eternal buffet
Offer freely
That which sates us most
Co-direct your very own
Destruction .
Fucking whimper
When we feed.

I am…created…
A switchblade saint
With a razor tongue,
Bleed for me
And let me destroy you

Don’t say you weren’t warned.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Vampire Voyeur
DATE: 04/26/2008 23:35:51
STATUS: publish
BODY:
She followed him silently into the night, Making sure to keep as much distance as possible between them without losing sight of his striding form. The muffled footfall of the premium leather of her heels on the pavement. Imperceptable to him from this distance. He’d dressed sharply, as always, crisp smoke grey Armani suit, Van Heusen shirt, Bally shoes; The toe buffed to a polished glint. The scent of Antaeus, lingering in the air. She could have followed Him on scent alone but chose to keep him within sight, He paused for a moment, before crossing the street, and she slunk back into the shadows. She believed He wouldnt know she was there. He couldnt know. She was after all quite skilled in hiding.
After he crossed she knew he’d head to the left, the posh club at the corner of 33rd and central would surely be his destination this night. She waited in those shadows as the light changed from green to amber to red, watching his moving form on the other side of the street. When again the flow of traffic changed with the lights she scurried across the street. A cat call from a balding gentleman in a camaro convertable, caused her eyes to snap towards his still moving form, hoping that call wouldn’t draw his attention. Thankfully it didnt. Again she found the solace of the shadows on the opposite side of the street. Keeping that distance as they both made their way toward the lighted neon sign up ahead.
Flashing bursts of orange and blue light advertising “Symbiotics” the most exclusive club on the main strip. She waited a few doors down as he entered the club, counting mentally within her mind, the seconds that he was out of her sight. Visualizing his movements within the establishment toward the bar where she knew he’d order a drink first and foremost. Timing had to be just right, she didnt know if he’d be watching the door, so it was critical that she got inside while he was ordering that drink. While she knew his back would be turned. Hurried footsteps brought her to the entrance, the slinky black dress she’d chosen meeting the leering approval of the doorman, he thumbed her through without question, it was after all Ladies Night, no cover charge.
The place would be teeming with available and eager females. Her eyes darted to the bar,as she exhaled a sigh of relief, indeed he was ordering a drink… this her chance to find a dark corner. Inconspicuous and out of the way. Once settled into the comfort of the dimply lit shadows, she drifted a gaze of green about the place. Eyes raking over the bodies within, dressed in their nightclubbing finest. She mostly overlooked anyone with bleached hair or too much flamboyance, she knew he had exquisite tastes, he would seek out …the perfect soul. She watched quietly as some tried to turn predator into prey, approaching him brazenly only to be given the once over by his critiquing eye before he would shake his head in silence.
Sometimes this ritual would bring blatant protests other times they would just meander away in search of the next best conquest. She watched his eyes as he sipped upon the drink, he too was scouting the room, each time those ebony eyes would settle upon someone her own would follow the line of vision to who he was looking at. She scented the air honing her senses on the female he was inspecting, a slight wrinkle to her nose…poison…cocaine. No she knew he’d not choose someone who toxified their body. Again she looked to his eyes and followed their line of vision. It settled upon a girl in silver lamae. Again she scented the air, this one was clean, and she smelled good to boot, a hint of musk, not at all over powering.
Charming actually. Well put together, with dark hair and crystal blue eyes. Yes she hoped he’d choose this one. She watched silently as He studied this female, perhaps weighing his options for the night, then heard as the Bally shoe on his right foot slid forward slightly. He was moving to the girl. She leaned further back in the shadows, certainly not wishing to be seen at this juncture, there would be hell to pay. She watched as he leaned over the girls table, meeting eyes; ebony to blue. Then motioning for a drink to be brought over to his new found partner for the night. Yes, he was absolutely charming, undeniably. He would have what he wanted this night.
All too soon the hours passed as she sipped upon the wine she’d snagged from a passing waiter, and she watched as he stood and offered his hand to the blue eyed woman. There was no question as to whether that offer would be taken, a small hand reaching for his own as he led her to the elevators within the club. Again she took up her distance following, waiting for the elevator doors to close before watching to see where the lift stopped. Floor number two, they were on the second floor. She waited a while finishing the wine in the glass before stepping onto the elevator herself, certain that they would have retired to a room by this time. Pushing the 2 button within the mahogany box and ascending to the second floor.
His Antaeus still lingering in the air as she followed it down the plushly carpeted hallway. She paused looking at the door to room 233…this one, this is where they were. Now to figure a way inside. She exhaled slowly as she thought about this. Her ears perking to the squeeking wheels of a bellhops cart, a slow grin spreading over crimson lips. Retreating quickly from the door she moved sown the hall to the source of the sound. that Grin she carried spreading even bigger as she saw the middle aged porter pushing a large cart full of baggage. He was absolutely busy as she’d hoped he might be. Feigning urgency she rushed to the cart and hurriedly explained about leaving her key in the room and absolutely needing to get in there right away. at first He told her to check with the desk in the lobby but she persisted, she really wasnt feeling well and felt as though she might pass out, surely Symbionics and its owners didnt want the stigma of not taking care of their patrons. He nodded slowly in thought then reached into his pocket for a Master key holding it out to her. Slender fingers coiled about the keycard with a most grateful smile. She offered to return the key post haste, knowing that his night was going to be filled with baggage carts, He politely declined and told her to leave it at the desk when she checked out.
She smiled, somewhat feebly, thanked him and made her way back down the hall… Mission…accomplished. Heading again to room 233, she listened against the door, the sound of Mozart heard from behind it. She smiled again and exhaled in a soft sigh, yes, he was absolutely perfect…always. Sliding the keycard deftly throught the slot and carefully, silently, turning the handle to open the door, each movement absolutely silent, as if her life depended upon it, and perhaps… it did. Parting the door from the frame just enough to slip herself inside then repeating the process to close the door. Slowly exhaling a silent sigh of relief as her fingers lifted from the handle and the door was closed.
The music covering her breathing as she slipped into the 3 room suite. The lights in the main room and kitchen off providing ample cover as she made her way inside upon silent footfall. the door to the bedroom left ajar as she boldly leaned against the frame to watch. the glimmer of candlelight upon the bureau reflected in the mirror to cast a soft glow about the room, as immediately her ears caught the ragged breathing within the room, the scent of sex permiating her nostrils. She watched in silence using the lit mirror as her vantage point, watching the fluid movements of them fucking. His body viewed in the mirror, without the adornments of the suit, chiseled, strong. A soft groan escaped her lips before catching herself and silencing.
Her eyes tracked his movements in the mirror as the fingers of her left hand drifted down over taut abdomen to reach beneath the short dress hem. Her cunt wet; receptive. Nimble digits curling inward to fuck herself in the same rhythm as his movements, her eyes trained upon the reflective surface.
Soft whimpers and moans of arousal came from his chosen partner for the night writhing beneath him.
She watched ,mesmerized as fingers plunged and twisted into the wet heat between her thighs. Her breathing in soft stuttered gasps as she pushed herself closer, timing it just right. Watching , waiting, tensed as she clung to that very edge. She knew from the sounds it was almost time. The body beneath him, too, tensed and it was at this very moment that he curled his form to brush velvety lips to the ivory column beneath an ear.
She saw, even in the mirror the reddish glint to his eyes, and she knew. A whimper, then a shriek at the exact point of orgasm as his fangs sunk into the tender flesh, pinpointing the throbbing vein buried so shallowly beneath the surface. His grip upon slender wrists fast as he sated his hunger deep.
Green eyes transfixed on that mirror she too came at that very instant, her fingers finding the release she’d been holding back as her cunt contracted and inner floodgates opened, her knees nearly buckling from the intensity and her groan stifled.
Before she could even blink again to refocus her eyes a voice stretched across the room, a voice that gripped her very heart.
“To me, my bitch”
She stood , frozen. He’d heard her. Not only had he heard her, but he saw her there with her fingers in her soaked cunt. Thighs coated with the glistening sheen of her release.
He smiled that lopsided grin of his and moved toward her as his fingers reached for the raven tendrils of her hair, curling into silken strands and pulling her near for a soul raping kiss. The coppery vitae of his victim still warm upon his lips as they crushed possessively to her own. then he drew back and said.
” did you REALLY think I hadnt heard you following me?” and further.. ” Did you REALLY think anyone could simply sneak up on me?”
She shook her head quickly murmuring “No, my Master.”
His grin spread again as he said.
“Well my devious little beast now its time to pay pennance for your failed attempt, just as you were the watcher, now too shall you be the watched” and with that, and his grip upon her hair he led her to the window overlooking the busy drag below, his other hand yanking the dress up around her waist as he leaned in close and hissed in her ear.
“Masturbate here before the window. Open the curtains.
Do not hesitate. Just follow orders. “
She looked to him, then to the street as his voice continued on, his grip loosening and leaving her hair as he stepped back
“Yes, people will see. Yes, you might shock them. Do it.”
He smiled and repeated
“Masturbate.”
Her fingers again found that still quivering cunt and plunged again into their depths, her eyes falling upon the form of a passing woman, she turned a pleading glance to him which was acknowledged by.
“Yes, I know she���s there. Yes, I see her shock. Masturbate.”
The Woman stopped her eyes fixed on the Window and again his voice permiated the air
“I know she���s watching. I know she can���t stop. Masturbate.”
A passing Man noticed the Womans gaze and he too looked to the window, and without looking out himself , his eyes fixed on her He said.
“I see him as well. I know he likes it. Masturbate. faster.
Thrust them deep inside. “
She again drove herself closer to that edge, her eyes beginning to roll beneath a veil of thick black lashes
“No! Open your eyes! Watch them watching you. “
His growled command illiciting an immediate response as he intoned.
“get on that Edge, cunt, right fucking now. Cum for your audience, and this time you’d better fucking scream when you cum in my presence.”
And she did.
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Make me feel again…
DATE: 04/25/2008 17:53:16
STATUS: publish
BODY:

The tap of the cane is very light
rhythmic

The sway.
The tap.
And a voice.

“I want you to hurt me.”

From light warm taps,
to biting floods
A cane with a wicked slash
falls across alabaster skin

The sting and bite when it comes
hits with a brightness;
a flash of sensation
deep into creamy flesh

I want you to make me cry
and scream and struggle
and endure the pain
which opens the floodgates of sensation.

lay stripes across rounded ass cheeks
Lovely welts of color across trembling thighs
Well placed marks
Each landing in a spot untouched

Screams of pain, anguish, despair
cries of pleasure, need, and desire
uncontrolled response to this brutality
as the moisture drips from hungering cunt

I want to fight
the chains which hold me
to the cool stone wall
into which I meld.

Writhing against binds
muscles strain against the shackles
The cane alights
as body fights

Panting through the pain
intense heat building within
igniting suppressed feeling
pushing toward that Edge

I want you to make me feel
every long red welt
the rigid hand hewn cane
lays to my flesh.

my body; bare and lithe
slashed repeatedly
struggling futilely
pleading for less..and more

Your body; tall and strong
slashing repeatedly
grinning wickedly
embracing the violent desire

I want to cry
and scream and struggle
and endure the pain
that only you can bring.

I want you to hurt me.

Bad.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: reel of reality
DATE: 04/22/2008 13:09:26
STATUS: publish
BODY:

I miss the simple days of just bringing up a backgammon or lit board and playing a few games, even with our own made up rules… hustle and bustle of life, progress, time marches on, new technologies to explore, new venues, new avenues… sometimes just sneaking to the past is just the ticket. For the past few days I’ve sat here and simply let my mind flash back…to visuals… much like clips from a movie, except this movie we’ve lived. I rewind all the way back to the beginning of this particular movie I see chronological blips in time over the past 9 months… these wont mean much to someone that doesnt understand. but for the one that does… join me on a trip into the past.

The darkness of the shadows
from where I watched in silence
The idle rolling of die
in the palm of your hand.

You read through me like a book; even then.
Telling me what I was before I’d admit it.
The connection; instantanious.
I knew, without a doubt, the intensity we’d share.

A span of time and your return.
You seemed surprised
the connection still existed.
“you still belong, dont you , cunt?”

Red Licorice
contains red dye #40,
known to cause cancer in labratory animals.
I’d STILL not trade for a marshmallow.

Ahhh Backgammon
and loaded dice…
NO one rolls doubles time after time
you have yahoo on your payroll.

After 40 lashes,
you dont feel much anymore
I never minded losing to you,
I always won in the end.

slender fingers
brush over the green felt of a pool table
my territory; my chance for victory
and still… you won. ( losing has its advantages)

Literati…
could the point spreads
have been any wider?
remember, after 40…..

Letters to Santa
A wish list; short but important.
the jovial old fellow came through.
I wonder if he works in the off season….

Letters to you.
exposed truths; hidden admissions
doors opened
and things explored

A trip to the mall
movie theaters and oriental stores
a small blue velvet box
and the balanced spheres within

a length of silken braided rope
its color; that of burnished copper
lays within easy reach.
I reach for it from time to time.

Unvarnished nails.
Theres a reason for that.
still.
Some things shouldnt change.

The familiar scent of lighter fuel
that first whiff of a freshly lit cigarette
followed by the acrid scent of exhaled smoke
these things; the simple ones, touch me deeply.

The Cusp of Sublimity Inn
strange this should be one of my flashbacks
intense eye contact, always on top.
“a cup of post-coital tea, please…cunt?”

the quietude of chambers
where kohl rimmed pools of green
first set eyes on the brown eyed
black haired beast with a matching collar

An interesting meeting
enlightening
arousing
primal; animalistic

liquid gold
heated sustinance
a touch…just so
perfectly right.

The whack Master
yep even that
speaking of whacks…
allergies to cyber wax, who’da thought…

My Immortal, My way..
the perfect gift
for the perfect girl.
still brings tears to my eyes.

Touched by the music,
time and again.
certain songs just…
stop me in my tracks

trembling flesh knelt upon the sand
of the torture palaces pit,
hues of green locked on your form
as a slave is made available to those looking.

Thin wire of gold
its end well heated
to pierce tender flesh
a ring; pinky’s diameter curled upon itself

Art in PCC…
“a reversed, female, carbon-copy of Da Vinci’s “Vitruvian Man”,
in glorious, living, unmarked alabaster flesh;
rather than a mere drawing on parchment or paper.”

A birthday gift for pixie
I still think birthdays
should be celebrated weekly.
so did pix.

toga’s and booze
whips crops crosses and blades
the skillful carving to warm flesh
P-A-R-I-S…always one of my favorite memories

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: A Brave Face
DATE: 04/11/2008 10:27:08
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Our babygirl is not well. Every parent’s worst nightmare is when their child is sick, it wrenches our hearts and sets all senses and emotions on high alert. Our minds constantly churn out thought after thought on what could be ailing the child-of-our-heart and of course how to fix it in the quickest and most efficient manner. Above you’ll find the valiant attempt at a smile from one of the bravest girls I know who was really pretty scared at this point in the Emergency Room. On a good note We’ve ruled out heart issues, which was a major concern given the symptoms that manifested themselves. Her ticker is strong and solid, good thing … she’s got a lot of love in there. Her Father and I spent a good portion of the morning trying to come up with possible causes to have looked at when she goes back to the Dr. for a follow up. Vertigo, Anemia, Gallbladder…an assundry of things. He assures me this will get fixed and I believe him. My Rock when I fell apart. We both want nothing but the best for her. And that includes her to be out of pain, the morphine last night barely took the edge off , the darvocet this morning had her resting better. At least she can breathe easy now and her head isnt going to explode. We’ll both be watching over her very carefully.
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: TMD…..A
DATE: 04/10/2008 03:34:04
STATUS: publish
BODY:

As I sit here
I search within myself.
For a way to express my deepest feelings.
My fingers glide across the keys
In short strokes.
Simple words seem so trivial and ordinary
when trying to compare what I feel for you.
I backspace and start over.
What do you write,
when you’ve already said it all ?
Is there another way to tell you
that you’re always on my mind?
Is there another phrase
that will make you take it all to heart?
Is there anything I can do
to show that it wasnt fear but Love you found?
People say that time will heal my heart;
That I’ll get over it.
I only wish they’d understand
Why that will never be.
How do you replace a soulmate?
This funeral of a dream;
A tragedy and so much more.
The only pain I endured, was the pain of need;
An act of love.
This pain has come to mean everything to me.
So I sit and linger over every line,
and find I’ve used the words before
and they never quite express the feelings.
I crawl down deeper, digging out hidden emotions.
I am Locked. There is no key.
Because you hold it.
Searching valiantly for “that” word.
The one will say it all.
The word… that when you read it
You will instantly know how I feel.
Its so close.
I can almost reach out and touch it.
Its on the tip of my tongue.
But I can not find it
No matter how hard I try.
It escapes me.
I resign myself ;
Stealing age old words
Shared by millions.
They are not unique or original.
But as I think of them
It feels as if we created them.
I treasure and cherish you,
I long to hold you near.
I immediately realize that,
my last thought,
was the same as my very first.
This poem is because I love you.
I sought the words to express that,
And found myself using
The three very words,
That have been chosen for centuries.
They are simply
“I love you”
And I do.
And Forever I will.
Truly
Madly
Deeply

Always.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Shattered Dreams
DATE: 04/09/2008 01:28:51
STATUS: publish
BODY:

I take a mental walk
in this place that I’ve been sent;
a trip within my mind.
I begin in the small dark chamber
that I reside.

Fingertips brushing lightly
over the warm textured walls
of this place I dwell.
Its quiet here
in this prison of my mind;
lonely.

There is a small light; a tunnel
leading to the outside,
of the inside of my mind.
I follow the light; within my mindseye.

To step upon what appears to be
a sandy beach.
Once a familiar place
of joy and laughter.
A place we frolicked upon the silica.

Spheres of green look to the sky
there is no sunshine; only clouds of grey,
in this place where I now find me.

What was once a place of beauty
now desolate; silent.
No laughter lifts to the ether.
No smiling faces;
No happiness.

My body clothed;
covered in garb of diaphanous silk,
which flutters within the chilled breeze.
I am no longer free and bare.

Emerald eyes lower a funereal gaze
to what once was
a vast expanse of flawless seashore.
Now littered with jagged pieces of our dreams
in the wake of the storm.

Crystalline tears
slide slowly down soft rounded cheeks
as I fall to my knees to touch one.

Shaking fingers reaching; to caress.
Drawing one such piece to my breast;
Clasping it close to my heart,
as my eyes lift to the destruction
along the shoreline.

Dreams we dreamt together;
broken upon the sands.
I find myself alone to collect them,
here within my very own hell.

I scan the horizon
Wishing;
Hoping.
For a glimpse of
the movement of your form;
Your return.

I do not look behind me; I refuse.
For to do so would prohibit
the silence of your reappearance.
My heart,
has to leave that portal open.

I pray; while I’m on my knees
to any deity that might listen.
And I beg for one more chance
to fix our shattered dreams.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Entry for April 07, 2008
DATE: 04/07/2008 20:12:52
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: My Sacrifice
DATE: 04/07/2008 03:02:41
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: My Inspiration
DATE: 04/06/2008 19:11:42
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Sitting before this flickering screen
The candle dancing before my eyes
I wonder if I can believe in what Ive seen
In the dreams that Ive only fantasized

Do you know what you are to me
So much more than a muse or subject for a line
You are the very skill I have within me
You are the reason I write these prose of mine

You are the pen nestled my hand
You are the paper on which I write
You are the letters that flow on command
You are the passion that keeps me up late

You taught me to be strong; to believe
Your strength built my surity
For you I would do anything for a reprieve
You are the foundation that my dreams rest upon

So when you think of skill and grace
Remember that it isnt really me
When you see these things its like a mirror
For you are the inspiration to me

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: endless thoughts
DATE: 04/06/2008 08:24:31
STATUS: publish
BODY:

I sit alone; I wait for you
No choices left to make
Holding out my hand I pledge
Never to forsake

Your absence tests my sanity
My strength is fading fast
My hope for our future
Is balanced on our past

Divided by this unkind fate
Imagination adds its fuel
My mind conjures tricks
Thoughts that are so cruel

My heart, however beats so strong
And always will hold true
To this endless belief
A belief I have in you

If I could have one wish
If it could truly be
I’d wish for one more chance,
A chance for you to see.

I believed in you so deeply
And I was never blue
We belonged together
I knew our love was true.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Soulmates
DATE: 04/05/2008 17:02:31
STATUS: publish
BODY:

We have loved all through eternity, you and I
A glance
a stance
a fleeting gesture
We gaze from afar
We are the prisoners of pre-destined love
Through the window of a passing train
Or from across the room at a party
We know instantly the eternal bond that
re-kindles,
once again,
feelings we have shared
since the beginning of time
To love for infinity
the touch
of your hand
upon my face
The undeniable embrace
The kiss that stirs a million memories
between soulmates long apart
reunited once again
In some other age or eon,
Kindred spirits whose lives intersect,
time and again
And in that moment,
we feel this eternal love,
fated to be lovers,
through the realms
Fate hands us the key to unlock our hearts
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Darling Nikki…
DATE: 04/05/2008 12:32:38
STATUS: publish
BODY:

She has reached that age where she knows it all.
Tells me day in, day out, this is how it should be.
Please remember I am a big girl now.

I can do anything.

What happened to the little girl I once knew.
She was a sight to behold … even then.
I have just learned, that love changes.
transforms…

As she has changed, so much…

Long beautiful golden hair, cut, colored.
Chopped to the ground, weightlessness
at its best. A teenage pixie has replaced,
the uneven edges of a lil the girl
I once knew.

Boys are hot, lil brothers are brats.
Can I have more money for this?
No, I do NOT want that. Take me here.
I am gonna go there. Mooooooom….

No Mom, I will do as I like.

I’m sorry Mom, for being so disrespectful.
I’m sorry your sick, how can I help?
Oh the heart, she leads it so well.

Lil finger crooked to Mom,
with prideful, straight tooth grin,
so you wanna be my friend…

A daughter to be proud of.
Brilliant… too damn smart.

Reading…
She writes, (grins)
What will she do next…

Beautiful smile, reminds me of my Mom.

Sparkling eyes of mischief
Yes, she has my number, sure enough.
I do all I can. Love her with all my soul.
Knowing…
She is the daughter of my heart…

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Intended….
DATE: 04/02/2008 04:37:57
STATUS: publish
BODY:

My beloved kindred spirit,
Do you doubt we share,
A love that is transcendent,
A love so truly rare?

Our soul’s prescribed dominion;
Will give us no choice.
Time; it stands still,
When I hear your voice.

Fate’s had its way
Your eyes have met mine,
Lost in forever
We travel past time.

My Pureblood Vampire
Our hands they shall touch
Mine, soft and fragile
Yours warm and rough.

Nothing will stop us,
When we start to dance.
As our souls meet,
Its not left to chance.

A force of nature,
Destiny ordains.
Solitude cast aside,
Released from the pains.

To each other’s center,
We will be led,
Seduction upon us,
Our hungers fed.

My heart, for you only,
My flesh will surrender,
Respond to your warmth
To your touch, harsh or tender.

A coveted encounter,
Fulfilled at long last,
We’ll know from then on,
That we share a past

It stretches from lifetimes,
So long ago.
Our love was intended.
And so it shall flow.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: A Vampires Respite
DATE: 04/01/2008 05:07:22
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Close your eyes
take a mental sojourn
inside your mind
quell the demon within
relax
subdue

Come to me
lie with me before the fire
your head upon my breast
bring to me your desolate soul
fractured
tormented

Rest with me
feel fingers; splayed
draw idle patterns
through your hair
lightly
softly

breathe deep
fill your lungs
with tranquility
listen as my heart beats
rhythmic
lulling

exhale slowly
nothing rushed
feel the tension leave you
clear your weary mind
quietude
serenity

bring to this place
your aggrieved soul
find contentment once again
in this place you know so well
placid
tranquil

Feel the comfort
surround you
the warmth envelope you
in this place of peace
familiar haven
home

you’ve journied here within your mind
this place exists in real
the door is always open
the light is always on
a beacon
guiding

No one knows you like I do
feel my presence there
I feel your pain,I share your soul
I understand your needs
truly
deeply

You once explained to me, what coming home felt like after a long journey….Dont forget where you live.
Hotels, Motels, Hostels, Brothels, Boarding Houses, Resorts, Roadhouses, Rooming Houses… all have their charm for a little while… but there is no place like home, Where you can be, you.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: The Depths of My Soul…..
DATE: 03/31/2008 14:59:47
STATUS: publish
BODY:

T he questions of this day,
H earken to the unknown
E asily asked, yet . . .

D are I answer?
E ver have I shied away,
P iously avoiding
T ruth.
H iding, from myself
S ome are born to bear burdens

O thers, are forced to
F ear . . .

M atters of the mind
Y et ever do we . . .

S eek,
O nly to find no answers,
U nder the bridges of our minds
L ife’s dealt its blows

W aiting through my grief
I ncomparable though, to the pain of . . .
L ove.
L ove.

B arely a word, yet . . .
E ver does it echo the

R eality of a true heart
E ver gripped by my mind,
A ccosted by demons, yet . . .
L ove, beckoned.
I rresistibly.
S tepping tentatively,
E ver the cynic
D aring the whirlwind,

O f his intensity
N ever, in all my
L ifetimes, could I have known, a
Y earning, so powerfully compelling,

W ithout even a touch.
H ow can this be?
E ven as I ask, I . . .
N otice,

I don’t even care

A s it was fated,
M y heart was captured,

F ires were cooled,
I ce was broken.
N ow I have no fear.
A s always,
L ove does not kill demons,
L ove only soothes them
Y es, they are calm,

W ell, calmer.
I trust in him,
T rust in his strength.
H is love is strong ,

M ine as well.
Y et apart, I am only a part.

M y soul belongs to him, even
A s we drift.
S oon however,
T ogether,
E ternally,
R ealizing . . . wholeness, the true depths of my soul

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Creator, Artist, God, Master, Guide, Darkness
DATE: 03/30/2008 18:06:20
STATUS: publish
BODY:

You’re a thousand words and more to me
The ink to fill my pages and make me complete
The brush with which I paint my canvas
And the muse that fills this empty sheet

You remove all those stains of deceitful past;
Stripping bare the layers
And pulling down the false facade
Painting me anew
In vibrant impassioned heat

You’re the peacock feather that dazzles in mournful array
That knows not the grey goose feather left dirty ‘pon the shore
And yet you’re more than this
Though still that complex, honest man
Who has held me enthralled since the beginning

And I know that fancy metaphors and lavish words
Will never bear any true comparison to this love that I feel
For this raw emotion of the heart
Is something infallibly and indescribably beautiful
Intense, profound
And real

But I just want to let you know
That you bear the only key to my soul
And however much I might fight
I’ll be forever helpless to you
Victim and victor to love’s might

My belief in you never falters
My trust never wavered
My loyalty eternal
In this lifetime and the others
I will belong.

I fear not the darkness
I am not afraid
The depth of the abyss is my home
The belly of the beast
Is mine to embrace

Reach out to me, one time more
I will not disappoint you
Take my hand within your own
As we follow the path
That destiny pre-scribed

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: The Cadence Of Your Moans
DATE: 03/30/2008 10:54:06
STATUS: publish
BODY:
The taste of your words linger in my mind
The scent of your flesh intocixates me.
Moan for me as I take you in my dreams
Gently
Softly
Slowely
Surely
Sweetly
I am your whore
Throat you…deep
Coat your torch with my sin
to implode you
And
Make you shatter from within
My longing is your power
I swallow you
In one fell swoop
Your desires are my commands
Caress your staff
And
Trap yourself in
Masturbation
Pleasure yourself as you read along
Let every vowel be my tongue over your earlobe
Let every consonant be a nibble on your bottom lip
Let every sentence be the my fingers conquering every inch of your sex
Let this perv note be my body moving against yours
Let this action be
A cybernetical Intercourse
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Upon Armegeddon’s Field
DATE: 03/29/2008 20:12:36
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Where the bloodstained alone can stand
Where angels dare not tred
and demons tremble
I am there

In the darkness of Vampire souls
In the brightest of Noble aspiration
and every shade of grey in between
I am there

When wounds beg to be stitched
When pain begs to be salved
and when bodies and souls both ache
I am there

Across bloodied swath
At campfire warm and bright
and at their last gasping breath
I am there

When eyes of coal
Meet spheres of emerald
Upon Armegeddon’s field
I shall stand

For I know the Beast within
I dwell within its core
and when you have finished your bloody work
I shall be waiting to embrace you

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: The Awakening
DATE: 03/28/2008 14:23:07
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Orbs of emerald,
shift to right.
Silence here,
in blackened night.

Heightened senses;
perked around.
Intent to capture
any sound.

Resting here,
before I rose.
Quiet slumber;
this repose.

Labyrinthine thoughts,
run through my mind,
in this solitude
I find.

Psionic feelers;
across ether stretched.
Within my Mind
a picture etched

A man; a Vampire-
tortured soul
hair of black
and eyes of coal

Upon this earth
his foot does tread.
Weak ones cowered,
before they fled.

Knowing smile,
upon my face.
Features veiled,
‘neath gossimer lace.

He hunts, He feeds.
Hunger; he does sate.
While in the shadows,here
Quietly… I wait.

Vivid pictures
play for me.
Every movement;
I can see.

When he’s through.
he will return.
His homefires, here
will always burn.

Hunt, my Love,
Stalk the hallways.
Here at home,
I’ll love you always.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Intravenous Refreshment
DATE: 03/27/2008 11:53:51
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Have I mentioned being deathly afraid of needles? Ironic isnt it, I lust for whips and crops and blades… and I’m afraid of a tiny needle? I’ve always been this way. I was the mother who left the room when my children got immunized in case the nurse MISSED and stabbed me instead. I couldnt even be in the same room as a needle. It seems however that my physically weakened state and some serious stress required that I fearlessly face the needle brigade ( alright not so fearlessly, I bawled like a fucking baby…but I sat STILL so they didnt have to poke me more than necessary… that counts for something right?)
Two plus weeks of shingles pain took their toll on my strength reserves. Stress, pain, and nerves balled my stomach into a knot, and I began feeling seriously nauseous, then came the vomiting…seems I’d fallen into a pattern. The gastric juices had nothing to digest and everytime I threw up, it’d move up and inflame my gastrointestinal tract (my esophagus), causing more nausea and stomach ache, leading to more throwing up and repetition of the whole process. And so the reflux action goes on and on. The only way to stop it was to get poked with anti nausea stuff and rehydrate my dehydrated body on a glucose/saline solution drip. Which meant a freaking IV. Damn. So they poked the needles and tubes in, took whatever blood they needed, let the glucose/saline solution drip in, etc etc…after working myself into a tizzy over the needles, I was too tired to care. Thanks to the wonders of modern medicine, some 4 hours later, I’m hydrated and not throwing up, and I even snapped a picture on the phone! I’m not any less afraid of needles, it’ll take some serious desensitation for that, but I am feeling more awake, which is a good thing. Sleeping 18 fucking hours a day was getting seriously old.
Now to take care of some other …business.
I know why you didnt. Just like you know me, I know whats going on inside you. And its fine. Nothing will change that. When you’re ready, and I’m stronger, fate will deal its hand. It always does. Nothing in the intrim matters. So go on, lay the world to waste, chew through them like the buffet they are. Time and Space… Go ahead and doubt. I know the truth. You know the truth. Thats all that Matters. No matter what we’d like to believe, fate knows better. Enjoy them, my Love. Feed. We all need to eat. *grins* Vampires arent we all. *laughs* Time….and ….Space.
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: I thought that you should know…
DATE: 03/27/2008 03:49:28
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Through the shadow of mist and night
I make my way back to the places we called ours
those places where we met, and gathered
in hopes that you will find me

am I a coward to hide from this
For I covet it every night, Dream dreams I should not
I long for forgiveness so that I
Can find my way home

I want to hold you again,comfort your pain
to find ourselves free to smile and free to laugh
I dream of these things and
I wonder can it be fixed?

I do not know so I hide
In the shadows from you and your hurt eyes
Perhaps you doubt I ever felt it
Perhaps you didnt know.

the depth of the comsumption
belonging; possession
How hard it is to live now,
I cant force myself to eat.

For I gave you my heart and soul
And though you’ve taken back words and being
My soul is and always will be yours
for the keeping

So I walk around a zombie
Tracing your footsteps
through the places we would once go to talk
Looking for any lingering piece of you

I am so lost now
But even if you don’t believe me
I love you still
Just thought
You
Should
Know

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Crimson Letters…
DATE: 03/26/2008 07:44:49
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Strung tight there; upon the cross
for all the world to see.
Within these bounds and shackles
its where she’s truely free.

Glazed hues of green they peer about;
intoxicated senses.
They seek the form she holds so dear;
who strikes down all defenses.

Locked upon his gaze so dark,
she clearly sees intent.
And with his cool look, of regard,
her soul has thus been rent.

Piteous whimpers stretch the ether,
soft sighs caress the air.
Her body aches for nearness,
beneath his cold dark stare.

Small ears they perk to movement,
his steps; as they draw near.
Within this space around them
is all that she holds dear.

A soft caress to nipple pert.
A tender stroke of skin.
And then his words murmured to her lips
“Now let the pain begin”

A pinch and twist upon that bud.
A breath gasped in a hitch.
Again his words caress soft lips
“It’s time to scream, my bitch”

“You know I’m going to hurt you,
you know you’re going to bleed,
and with my marks upon your flesh
I will thus sate, each; our need”

His fingers brush to caress,
blue bruises ‘pon her throat.
And then they squeeze to windpipe;
a digital garrote.

Her eyes they roll ‘neath raven lashes.
Her breathing it does cease.
And with his grip upon her neck,
her mind finds; Master’s peace.

His lips they find a pulsing vein,
within that ivory column.
And teeth they find her flesh so fair,
as mind floats; body numb.

Fingers now release their grip.
Air sucked deep within.
Her mind begins a freefall now.
This is their mortal sin.

Green hilt of knife curled to his palm.
Sharp tip pressed to her flesh.
A scream escapes her trembling lips.
Their bond renewed; afresh

To tender skin beneath her breast,
His marks were made blood red.
He carved them clear into that place,
and for his name she bled.

And then he raped his hanging beast,
as fate looked from above.
He took her hard and then he bred
for this eternal love.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Across the Ether…
DATE: 03/21/2008 06:39:27
STATUS: publish
BODY:

.

You say things to me.
And they fall easily from your lips,
Like jewels of luster and worth.

.

For me, you string them together.
A thousand words and more.
A brilliance of which I have never known.

.

I stir from my slumber, visually searching the room.
You’re not there. I can’t see you. I close them again.
Yet, I still hear your voice. You still call for me.

.

I lie, alone there it seems, as years pass to decades,
Decades to eras and eras to eons.
People pass, forget; ignore. Not you. You’re always there.

.

This knowledge, spiritual; beyond earthly reason.
Metaphysical; Beyond human comprehension.
Exceeding cognizance, perception, prehension.

.

Our souls entwined from the beginning of time,
Where minds can not fathom depths.
Drawn together lifetime after lifetime.

.

Our connection; instantaneous.
A familiarity between our souls.
A spark, a flash, a moment of recognition.

.

Through the foggy haze of time past.
My soul reaches out for its consort.
Caressing the ether, with a feather-light brush.

.

Your spirit, soul, and heart, call out to me.
I respond to awaken from the world of darkness.
Where I’d thought I would forever sleep.

.

Your figure outlined by an ungodly aura.
That smile. That glorious radiance.
Your smile Can stop wars with a glance.
.
It freezes time, slows us down.
A suspended animation,
Of the hustle and bustle of time as we know it.

.

A single second’s tick on the clock,
Stretching to that of a minute.
Each minute…an hour.

.

Our souls reunite; rekindle.
Exploring the vast labrynths of time apart.
And renewing the bond we share lifetime after lifetime.

.

We’re a thousand words and more.
The ink to fill pages and make legends complete.
The brush with which to paint canvas, in startling color.

.

I know that fancy metaphors and lavish words
Will never bear any true comparison
To this love; this raw emotion of the heart.

.

We share something infallibly and indescribably beautiful.
Intense, profound and real.
And I fall back into your arms, for another eternity.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Happy Birthday Nikki~
DATE: 02/27/2008 18:36:41
STATUS: publish
BODY:

This is dedicated to Nicole, the rest of you can read along, it probably wont make much sense, but to her it will.

My first born… a trip down memory lane that spans the last 19 years starting with the day you arrived. Those ‘firsts’ we all want to be perfect, and I was no different, my serious adamance to have a drug free delivery because that was what was considered healthier for you… wtf WAS I thinking?? I’m not exactly the kind of person that revels in the pain of having my insides pushed to the outside of my body. by the time I realized the error of my ways… it was too late to do anything, thusly your very long, very painful very uncomfortable arrival commenced… I dont think Dr Purdon, the hollandish clog wearing OB believed in episiotomies… and I genuinely believe that is the only time I’ve ever screamed at the top of my lungs the words “WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING DOWN THERE!!!” at any rate, births happen all the time and eventually yours was complete. they always say its amazing how that pain is immediately forgotten the first time they place your child in your arms. Never have truer words been spoken. You were, angelic, heaven sent, perfection, and poetry in motion. all 10 fingers and all 10 toes, baby blue eyes and a head full of hair. And I was absolutely anal about everything having to be just right, here are some very true, and funny things that I’ve come to believe to be true over the course of having 3 children, with you being my first….

Being a parent changes everything. But being a parent also changes with each baby. Here are some of the ways having a second and third child is different from having your first.

Your Clothes

1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.

Preparing for the Birth

1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
2nd baby: You don’t bother practicing because you remember that last time, breathing didn’t do a thing.
3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your 8th month.

The Layette

1st baby: You pre-wash your newborn’s clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby’s little bureau.
2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can’t they?

Worries

1st baby: At the first sign of distress – a whimper, a frown-you pick up the baby.
2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.
3rd baby: You teach your 3-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.

Pacifier

1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it.
2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby’s bottle.
3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.

Diapering

1st baby: You change your baby’s diapers every hour, whether they need it or not.
2nd baby: You change their diaper every 2 to 3 hours, if needed.
3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to thto their knees.

Activities

1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, BabySwing, and Baby Story Hour.
2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.

Going Out

1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home 5 times.
2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.
3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

At Home

1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn’t squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the child ren.

tragedies

1st child: when first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays.
2nd child: when 2nd child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for coin to pass.
3rd child: when 3rd child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!

I dont think you ever got dirty before your 4th birthday… You ended up being as terrified of dirt as I, running to me the second your hands got sticky to be wiped clean. glad that all changed by the time you turned 5.

I think back, to those days on Timken, those silly sayings we shared between the two of us.

” Good night Nikki, see you in the morning” …” eight thirty, eight o clock?”…” yeah, eight thirty, eight o clock” ( I loved how you changed time to suit you)

” What’re you looking at me like I’m foreign for?”

“breakrist?” …. “no… breakFIST” (accompanied by the balling of a fist to emphacize the enunciation to a 3 year old)

And then the move to Northern Minnesota where the killer deer ran rampant and the show drifts reached the roof line. What WERE we thinking, Dumpling?

The move back to Michigan, no place to go, no jobs… living with Dorth and Frank, but what fun we had!

Trophies in 4-H, ribbons, GRAND Champion Turkey! Way to go, darlin!

do you REMEMBER the showmanship that year? Joe Huhns bird, getting away… you handled it like a pro and got praised by the judge. I knew you always had your wits about you even under duress.

Locke Rd. God I hated eminem.. I learned alot during that period. pity your sister and brother get to follow in your footsteps, I’ve already got the routine down pat, they dont stand a chance *weg*

*Squeeeeeeeeealllllllll* ” uhm mom, I think I did something”….. “uhh yeah, Nik, You broke your arm”…..” are you sure mom? I really dont want it to be broken, cant it just be sprained?” … “uhm, no Nik, I’m pretty sure its broke, forearms generally arent shaped like a Z” Bodies in shock and no pain really are a good thing, it kept us both from freaking RIGHT out. even through the one lane road construction on the way to the hospital, I dont ever recall having the urge to throttle one of those guys that stand there holding the stop signs before that moment in time. Yep you even dealt with THAT like a pro.

and now… here we are, through it all , the good , the bad, the uncertain… we’re still closer than I ever fathomed possible. I’m proud of you Nikki. Of who you are, who you’ve become and who you will be. My tenacious, stubborn, intelligent, articulate, beautiful baby girl. I love you, today ,and always.

Happy birthday, beautiful.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: The Race is on…..
DATE: 02/27/2008 07:20:01
STATUS: publish
BODY:

You are there before me, atop me
behind me, between me,
the animal within You inside me.
I feel me teetering at the edge,
begging for that merciful stroke that will finish me
but You will not allow that yet,
and You all but withdraw from me
as You pull in on ebony tendriled reins.
I still buck to be ridden,
my nether lips clutch at you
desperately
to hold You inside,
but You don’t waver in Your stance
to hold me at bay,
pressing down irresistibly with one hand
to halt my undulating hips
as You take Your time to regard me.
silken black tresses in matted strands
stuck to the slick sheen of my back,
and oh,I would hate the way that looks,
but You do love the mess You make of it.
I whimper pleadingly,
knowing better than to articulate then.
You’ll notice a stream of my sweet dew
running the course of my crevice bound
first by strengh, then tenderness,
joining with the molten pearls of my desire
at the persistent pucker upon You.
I am lulled by my surrender,
startled when You bury Yourself inside me,
forcing out an equal volume of my gasped breath.
Your filly is ready to run again,
but Your grip on my mane tells me otherwise.
There. You hold us at the absolute of Our connection,
Our conductance,
Our completion.
Splayed fingers smack the rounded swell of my ass,
Your ruddy print upon my flesh serving as a fading timer
to determine the length of my duration.
I obey Your tantric dictum,
and we each feed the other for the eternity it seems.
But I cheat…
squeezing little gulps,
voluntary and not.
In reply You shift changing the angle of You inside me
swelling to reserve girth.
The heat is incredible,
the whistle blown
and the race is on.
Caught in a heartbeat, Your Arabian is well mounted,
teeth embedded in my soft shoulder, rending.
The kill; a feat of bestial bliss
and You growl loudly as You deliver Yourself
fully within me,
taking me; falling with me
into the abyss of Our paradise forged.
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: I am the one…
DATE: 02/18/2008 18:22:11
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Thinking about You as You slumber, dream decadent debauched thoughts, my Love. And remember… I am the one.

I love You.

I am the One
From the dark side of your dreams
I am the One
The one who answers to your screams
I am the One, I am the One
And I am a vampyre a-calling for your love
I am the fire that burns within your blood
I am the One, I am the One
I am the One, I am the One
No bars or chains can keep me from your bed
Nothing on earth can get me from your head
I am the One, I am the One
I am the One, I am the One
And I’m the angel of your desire
Burning in the night
I’m the pyre, I’m the fire
Come to set you alight
I’m the One
Forget the past, live only for tonight
How many loves have shared such pure delight?
I am the One, I am the One
I am the One, I am the One
I’m the angel of your desire
Burning in the night
I’m the pyre, I’m the fire
Come to set you alight
I’m the One
Rest now, my love, let troubles slip away
I shall return on the darkening of the day
I am the One, I am the One
I am the One, I am the One
And I’m the angel of your desire
Burning in the night
I’m the pyre, I’m the fire
Come to set you alight
I’m the One
I’m the One

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Belly of the Beast
DATE: 02/10/2008 17:35:23
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: A tiny mink ball
DATE: 02/10/2008 08:13:52
STATUS: publish
BODY:

I have a little mink ball; my in-animate creature comfort… Silly to think that at 41 I’d be attached to something so small and useless. But the truth is I’ve carried this mink ball with me through 13 moves, 7 states, the birth of 3 children and god knows what else. I took it from my Mama’s mink stole when I was about 4. I wasnt allowed pets, Papa wouldnt allow it, so as a child I attached to this tiny round bit of fur with two beedy black eyes. I’ve protected this thing as though it were the rarest of diamonds, so much so, that at times I’ve forgotten where I put it for safe keeping. But some how, by the powers that be, I’ve always managed to find this little mink ball when I needed it most. This small puff has shared more tears with me than one could ever imagine, both joyful, and heartbreaking. This morning when I woke, my monitor wouldnt respond, something its never done before, simply a black screen, even through reboot and repower…nothing…and I was bummed. so I began clearing off the monitor shelf of my desk, figuring that apparently these new LCD monitors dont last as long as CRT ones did. My desk of course is the symbol of genius at work… its piled with everything from wild rice soup recipes to electric bills , organized chaos I call it… cluttered? of course… but the genius mind can tell you were everything is… everything. I know if a single paper has been moved from my desk. anyway …I was cleaning off the shelf to actually get to the monitor base to unhook it all….when there it was, my little mink ball. I didnt put it there, under that stuff, I know I didnt so how it got there I’ll never know, but I paused, and I picked up the mink ball and I sat back in my chair and tried to figure out how this bit of fluff found its way to me again. For those of you that follow this 360, either because you care, or out of morbid curiousity, most should know that I’m a serious believer in fates, and in destinies, and in signs. over the past few days I’ve begged for signs, literally begged for them, I’ve tried connecting on seperate planes, reaching out and brushing over the mystical…and I’ve gotten signs, plenty of them…the ether world is pretty good to me that way, this dumb luck I seem to have really isnt dumb at all. The other morning, after trying to connect, I asked for those signs, now I dont leave these kinds of things to chance… I actually specify the unknown as you’ll remember in this blog…. http://blog.360.yahoo.com/blog-bXqGAjQ2erJNM96m.UPBxe3yxoXJNGo-?cq=1&l=36&u=4…
this time I chose, of all things, Yahoo chat log in codes… I figured if I was going to get a sign, lets make it unmistakable I mean who can read things into log-in codes… right?
these are the three I got… the three times I logged in,
the initial time… 8BYSS,
after getting booted the first time… 2B2B,
and after returning again later… LM28EG.
now I’m not going to tell you what I read into these things, for anyone intimately involved it’ll jump right out at you as it did me. these things, plus my little mink ball are clear signs to me. One of these days maybe you’ll see it too.

—–
COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 02/12/2008 17:05:43
love you
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: A Total Eclipse of the Heart….
DATE: 02/08/2008 17:10:02
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Yeah…this says it all. Turn Around, Baby….Turn and look back.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: There’s a hole.
DATE: 02/06/2008 09:34:25
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Que Sera Sera
DATE: 02/06/2008 08:03:09
STATUS: publish
BODY:

This was… unequivocably one of my Mama’s favorite songs, she sang it often. This particular video brings back those memories, Doris Day and my Mama could have been twins…. this song has a duel meaning for me, especially now. It is all about fate, after all. Que Sera Sera.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Devoted to our perfect insanity….
DATE: 02/04/2008 19:22:03
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: ~Absolution~
DATE: 01/27/2008 19:45:39
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Peculiar Aristocratic Title Generator
DATE: 01/25/2008 14:55:06
STATUS: publish
BODY:

My Peculiar Aristocratic Title is: Lady Gataki the Winsome of Bartonhurst in the River Get your Peculiar Aristocratic Title

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Turgid Writing……
DATE: 01/25/2008 12:17:27
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Master…of me.
DATE: 01/13/2008 17:45:19
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Transition Defined…..
DATE: 01/09/2008 19:27:51
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Today I saw somebody….
DATE: 12/20/2007 07:14:20
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Today I saw somebody. Who looked just like you.
He walked like you do, I thought it was you.
As he turned the corner, I called out your name, I felt so ashamed, When it wasnt you.
You are everything, And everything is you…
How can I forget, When each face that I see
Brings back memories…Of being with you?
I just cant go on, Living life as I do
Comparing each Man with you, Knowing they just wont do…They’re not you
cause you are everything, And everything is you…

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Whats the plan for Christmas?
DATE: 12/12/2007 12:28:36
STATUS: publish
BODY:

I knew it was only a matter of time before ‘that’ phone call would come in. Christmas is drawing ever nearer and after dropping 400 dollars and ALL the labor on thanksgiving’s meal I vowed I’d NOT be doing Christmas for anyone but my immediate family. Thanksgiving’s affair wiped me out, mentally, physically and even financially as far as the grocery budget goes. Funny how people that want to be invited to your house for a meal also want to decide what that meal will consist of. This year of course, like last, it was …. the Turdorken.

What is a Turdorken You ask?

Well, its akin to a Turducken, except… we added a pork loin. For the uninitiated, thats a boneless porkloin surrounded by cornbred stuffing, inside of a deboned duck surrounded by wild rice stuffing, inside of a deboned chicken surrounded by regular sage seasoned stuffing , inside of a deboned turkey. Then meticulously cared for and cooked for some 13 odd hours, where a gallon of drippings is drained off so it doesnt over flow and catch the oven burner on fire ( dont ask me how I know this….).

This years Turdorken weighed in at a whopping 41 lbs after cooking… precooked weights as follows… 26 lb turkey ( 24 after the bones were removed), 10lb chicken (9 sans its carcass) 7 lb duck (which weighed 6 after having its skeleton pulled from its body) and a 5 lb pork loin (was already boneless so no losses there) then add in 4 lbs of stuffings…and subtract a gallon of drippings. and holy moly was it good! but very time consuming. and very spendy. add in the precursors to the meal, cocktail shrimp, cheese balls, veggie trays, sausage and cheese and crackers, spinach dip and bread bowl , then tally up desserts… you can see where this ordeal cost me a pretty penny in time and effort. then factor in that I pulled this off alone, for 19 guests. nope I think I’m done till next year.

So todays call asking if I was ‘doing something for Christmas’ meaning a meal or a get together was responded to with a Vehement ….NO!

I hope we have a massive snow storm on Christmas…so no one drops by. I have a phone. they can call.

Then again… maybe a small honey glazed ham and just a few of my closest family…..

—–
COMMENT:
AUTHOR: Lee
DATE: 12/12/2007 15:24:30
Holy molly that sounds like quite the feast. I have to say I agree…I wouldnt do it again. Not sure ones arteries could handle more then one time a year. hope your well…happy holidays darlin
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——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Anger is one of the seven stages of grief….
DATE: 11/26/2007 10:48:39
STATUS: publish
BODY:

for any of you that can read into abstract art the above is a likeness of what I am feeling at present

I am angry, frustrated, confused.. lacking the ability to focus or to safely release.
I want to bite, annihilate,humiliate, tear apart, ruin, crumble, crush people.
I want them to hurt ,cry ,moan in pathetic pained whimpers.
I hate, loathe, despise weakness.
I want to unleash all the Fury that I am upon their helpless forms .
I want them to feel my pain, take it, understand it, finally see the darkness inside. I want them to fear, panic, try to escape the torturous torment that I wish to unload upon their innocent, piteous beings.
I want to inject my rage to instill agony, defeat.
I have sat quiet, dormant, placid…
as this seething anger churned and built up beneath the surface of a fake smile.
And as my very own soul writhes in pain and torment , I rip at the flesh upon my skeleton.
Stop the insanity.
Stop the rage.
Take this consuming pain from within.
Only you understand this…
Only you…. can stop it.

Only your voice can quell the beast within.

Only your touch can soothe aching flesh.

—–
COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 11/28/2007 14:54:46
I feel your pain sweet girl and can relate..

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: I am Thankful….
DATE: 11/23/2007 08:48:39
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Now that Thanksgiving is over, I thought that I’d take a bit of time to sit down and write a bit about the things which I reflected upon while preparing the feast for the masses.

These are the things I’m thankful for, to, and about in my life.

I’m thankful that I got to spend my day with my three children gathered around. My oldest is now off to college and as many of you know I home-school my children. Thusly going from having my daughter around nearly 24/7 to only seeing her once a month its a bit of an early empty nest syndrome.

I’m thankful that my children and I get along so well. We can talk about anything and everything and some of our very best learning and lessons take place in the pickup truck on the way to the city. That truck brings us all close together and enables us to have some pretty serious and pretty in-depth conversations without the distraction of radio TV or phone. Yeah I’m thankful for my truck too. Best thing Ford ever did was make a quad cab truck for us country bumpkins to drive to the city.

I’m thankful for my Papa who several years ago helped me to secure this house and the land, where we grow most of our meals, nearly free and clear. Michigan’s depressed economy means many people are losing their homes. And moving from the state. Papa’s gift to me ensures that even still our home is safe.

I’m thankful for the ability to raise the animals and vegetables we do, the freezer full of chicken turkeys and pork takes a great burden off the grocery bill.

I’m thankful for my friends on the net… some of which I’ll thank personally here… for those I don’t, please don’t take offense, its a big net and I only have so much time to type.

In No particular order…

Coe and phoebe~ Its been over two years now and yeah as strange as it is and as hurt as I got in your dysfunctional little family, I have no regrets because without the hell your deceit put me through I’d not have my relationship with the other innocent in your game. I am thankful for the time I spent in Coe’s collar, I learned a lot about Gor, slavery, and myself. I’m even thankful for the relationship I had with phoebe, in the beginning you showed me the ropes and took me under your wing. And in the end you taught me wariness and distrust, enough to keep me out of similar situations in the future.

lia~ Megan… what can I say? My one time sister in chains, my best friend, my confidant. We drift apart and back together again, always seeming to pick right back up where we left off. You are the bright spot, the sunshine in my life. Your effervescent nature never fails to bring a smile to my face. I’m thankful that you’re in my life and just as you are always here for me good bad or ugly, so too… am I here for you little sister. I love you kiddo and that will never change.

Stroke~ Whew! what a long strange trip its been, I always say that you’re the reason I am who I am and where I am in this on-line world and truthfully, you are. From that very first time we met in BDSM chat and began to speak nearly 8 years ago now, you’ve watched as I’ve grown and evolved. Many times I went off on my own exploring in the beginning and I’d always end up right back at your feet chittering like a squirrel on speed trying to explain all I’d found and explored. I can still picture the knowing grin on your face as you listened to my ramblings. And still here we are, your guiding hand ever present when I need it. You’ve never turned your back even when I was as venomous as I could get. I am truly thankful for your presence in my life.

Saff~ My reminder of why one should never judge a book by its cover. I remember when I first saw you lurking the halls of GCN and your demeanor in the Sanction infuriated me… what could someone so young know about Gor and Mastery? (laughs) You hung out with everything that was evil in my Gor and I pegged you for a gamer just like they were. Fate brought me to you at a different point in my life and now for well over a year through ups and downs, anger and joy, tears and elation we have withstood the test of time. You’ve proven time and again your strength ,your tenacity, and your compassion. I am thankful for your guidance, your wisdom, your compassion, your levelheadedness and even that irritating stubbornness you possess. Love you endlessly

Edge~ My dark side, my creative side…You opened.,once again, the visceral depths of my being. I found you playing backgammon with yourself… and I found, in you, one of the most complex, intelligent, insightful people I’ve ever met. You touched my heart in a way different than any other. I’ll never understand fully why you felt the need to exit my life without word or warning , but I am truly thankful for the time we shared. There will always be an empty place in my heart and in my life where you resided. And those places will always be open to you should you ever decide to return. At the Edge of the Abyss there will always be a Brighter Shade of Light and a Deeper Shade of Darkness because they simply belong, time nor space will change that. My love to you always.

Arach~ My long time pool buddy, I found you before you were even legal and put you to work in my league. We formed a friendship and a bond that has yet to be broken, I drug you to BDSM chat when you got old enough and eventually to Gor. You’ve learned and grown and in the process taught me many things in return. You’re always there with a upbeat nature and you dont let even the worst days bring you down. I’m thankful for your presence in my life.

Rolled Wave~ My Rock… literally. Another pool refugee that I’ve clung to. Your stability to me even when your own world was rocked to the foundation will always mean more to me than anything. We can spend literally years not speaking and just as open and honest with one another when we find ourselves together again. You never gave up on me even when I was ready to give up on myself, and you’ve always picked me up and dusted me off when I’ve fallen. Imy, Iwy, Ily, Iny…. always. Thank you so much for being in my life.

Clint~ Warhawk…. My buddy, my pal,my friend, always a helping hand and a listening ear, always a smile and a joke and a brightness in my life. Always an available lap and a enveloping hug, in happiness, sadness and everything in between. I miss you in Gor, and I miss our time together just shooting the breeze. You’ll always hold a special place to me. Always… just…always. Thank you Sweetheart.

If You didnt find your self mentioned here please, as I said take no offense, some things I prefer to keep private if we speak on a regular or semi regular basis believe that you’re in my mind and in my heart. I can only write so much… to thank everyone individually would take days.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Entry for November 10, 2007
DATE: 11/10/2007 11:22:43
STATUS: publish
BODY:

The sinking of the Edmund Fitzgerald and the loss of her 29-member crew during a violent fall storm on November 10, 1975, just northwest of Whitefish Point in southeast Lake Superior was at the time the worst maritime disaster on the Great Lakes in nine years. Of the more than 1000 ships that have found their graves under the icy waters of the Great Lakes, the Fitzgerald is still the largest ever to go down. Just like the Titanic, the demise of this seemingly invincible vessel has attracted widespread attention and inspired songwriters and authors to tell her story. Due to the ice cold water of Lake Superior, the bodies of drowning victims do not eventually bloat and rise to the surface; consequently, these men were never found.

“The legend lives on from the Chippewa on down of the big lake they call Gitche Gumee”

Gitche Gumee translates roughly to “Shining Big-Sea-Water”.

“The lake it is said never gives up her dead when the skies of november turn gloomy”

To put it rather bluntly, the reason so few bodies are recovered from off shore drownings
in Lake Superior is because the bodies first tend to sink (or are still on board a vessel) but
because of the depth and frigid temperatures, the victims do not naturally decompose.
Because of the lack of oxygen producing organisms, the bodies remain on the bottom.

“With a load of iron ore 26,000 tons more than the Edmund Fitzgerald weighed empty”

When empty, the Fitzgerald weighed 8,686 net tons. The hold was filled with 26,013 tons
of iron ore pellets called taconite, used mainly for automobile production.

“That good ship and true was a bone to be chewed when the gales of november came early”

Lake superior is on average 533 feet deep with an extreme depth of 1333 feet. It is 400
miles long which, when the wind blows across it’s length, the waves can build to greater
heights than found on less dense sea water, even in hurricane winds.

“The ship was the pride of the american side”

The Fitz was named after a Milwaukee banker and was launched into the River Rouge
basin in June 1958. The owner was Northwestern Mutual Life Insurance Company of
Milwaukee and operated by the Columbia Transportation Company.

“Comin’ back from some mill in Wisconsin”

Superior, Wisconsin.

As the big freighters go it was bigger than most” “

The ship was 729 feet long, 75 feet wide, 39 feet deep. She was the largest Great Lakes
steamer when launched in 1958, its size limited only by the largest lock on Sault St, Marie.
Larger 1000 ft. boats were possible after the construction of the Poe lock in 1969.

“With a crew and good captain well seasoned”

Captain Ernest R. McSorley, 62 years old, started sailing as a deckhand on ocean vessels
when he was 18 years old. After transferring to freshwater freighters, he made his way
through the ranks, eventually becoming the youngest to make captain.

“Concluding some terms with a couple of steel firms when they left fully loaded for Cleveland”

The Fitzgerald was “downbound” to unload its cargo in Detroit and then continue on to
Cleveland to dock for the winter months.

“And later that night when the ship’s bell rang could it be the north wind they’d bin feelin’”

The Fitzgerald and the Anderson, a second freighter following close behind, knew of the
gale warnings posted by the National Weather Service. They decided to alter their course
and head towards the North shore of Superior for shelter against the heart of the storm.

“The wind in the wires made a tattletale sound and a wave broke over the railing”

The two boats (great lake sailors prefer “boat” to “ship”), followed the Canadian shore to
the Caribou Island near “Six Fathom Shoals.” The Anderson’s captain Jesse “Bernie”
Cooper, remarks how close the Fitz is to the shoals. Crossing the lake in an attempt to
harbor the storm, the two make a course for Whitefish Bay Michigan. In heavy seas, the
Fitzgerald sustains topside damage and radios the Anderson, “Anderson, this is the
Fitzgerald. I have sustained some topside damage. I have a fence rail laid down, two vents
lost or damaged, and a list. I’m checking down. Will you stay by me till I get to Whitefish?”

“And every man knew as the captain did too, ’twas the witch of november come stealin’”

The Fitzgerald has two radar sets but both use a common antenna. The Fitzgerald calls on
the radio to the Arthur M. Anderson. “Anderson, this is the Fitzgerald. I have lost both
radars. Can you provide me with radar plots till we reach Whitefish Bay?”

“Charlie on that, Fitzgerald. We’ll keep you advised of your position.”

“The dawn came late and the breakfast had to wait when the gales of november came slashin’”

Winds were 40 to 45 knots with waves to 20 ft.

“When afternoon came it was freezin’ rain in the face of a hurricane west wind”

The Sault St, Marie Locks report winds of seventy knots, gusts up to eighty-two, about
ninety-five mph!

” When suppertime came the old cook came on deck sayin’ “fellas it’s too rough to feed ya”

Ironically, the “old” cook was suffering from bleeding ulcers and was unable to make the
last voyage. He is considered by some as “the sole survivor of the Fitzgerald”.

“At seven p.m. a main hatchway caved in he said “fellas it’s been good to know ya”

The Anderson reports being hit by two huge waves which go over the pilot house, 35 feet
above the water line.

“The captain wired in he had water comin’ in and the good ship and crew was in peril”

Although McSorley told the Anderson he had developed a list and was, infact, taking on
water, his main concern was that because of the loss of radar and new reports of the
Whitefish Bay Lighthouse being broken down, the Fitzgerald was sailing blind and due to
the list, the Fitzgerald was pulling to the left. They had to rely on the Anderson for
guidance. When the Anderson radioed back later to ask how they were doing with their
problem, McSorley replied “We are holding our own”. That was the last thing heard from
the Fitzgerald.

“And later that night when ‘is lights went out of sight came the wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald”

The tremendous waves on Lake Superior kept interfering with the Anderson’s radar,
showing the Fitzgerald some 10 miles ahead of her. As the Anderson would dip with a
large wave, the Fitzgerald and all other boats in the area would disappear, showing up
again as the Anderson would crest. At 7:10 the Anderson rose above a wave and the
radar showed three blips, saltwater ships, the Navafors, the Avafors, and the Benfri about
20 miles downbound. But no Fitzgerald. In the span of just a few seconds, with no distress
call, the Fitzgerald was gone.

“Does anyone know where the love of god goes when the waves turn the minutes to hours”

The Anderson contacted the Coast Guard in Sault St. Marie. “Soo Control, this is the
Anderson. I am very concerned about the welfare of the steamer Edmund Fitzgerald. He
was right in front of us, experiencing a little difficulty. He was taking on a small amount of
water and none of the upbound ships have passed him. I can see no lights as before and I
don’t have him on radar. I just hope he didn’t take a nose dive!”

The air temperature at the time was 49 degrees and the water temperature was 40
degrees. Under these conditions a man would go into shock in 30 minutes.

“The searchers all say they’d have made Whitefish Bay if they’d put fifteen more miles behind ‘er”

A floating debris field was found the next morning and a 1000 yard long oil slick about 13
miles from Whitefish Point. On later days, small objects were found near the Canadian
shore, lifevests and rings, bottles, splintered wood, the largest object being a crumpled raft
with the Fitzgerald’s name.

“They might have split up or they might have capsized they may have broke deep and took water”

The wreckage is in two major pieces. The bow section is 276 feet long and upright. The
stern section is 253 feet long and upside down. The sections are 170 feet apart. About 200
feet of the midsection is disintegrated. Although there is no conclusive evidence pointing to
what the cause was, the most popular therory is that because the Fitz was taking on water,
the taconite cargo shifted toward the bow making it unbalanced, heavy to the front. When
the Fitz plunged into the valley between two large waves, she submarined to the bottom,
striking the lake’s floor with enough force to break her in two.

“And all that remains is the faces and the names of the wives and the sons and the daughters”

There has been no attempt by the Great Lakes Shipwreck Museum at Whitefish Point,
which had made several exploratory expeditions down to the werckage, to recover the
crew.

“Lake Huron rolls Superior sings
in the rooms of her ice water mansion
Old Michigan steams like a young man’s dreams
the islands and bays are for sportsmen
and farther below Lake Ontario
takes in what Lake Erie can send her
and the Iron boats go as the mariners all know
with the gales of november remembered”

There is estimated to be more than 6000 commercial shipwrecks in the Great Lakes, and
fewer than half of these have been located.

“In a musty old hall in Detroit they prayed
in the maritime sailors’ cathedral
the church bell chimed ’til it rang 29 times
for each man on the Edmund Fitzgerald”

The ship went down in Lake Superior on November 10, 1975 with 29 men on board.

“The legend lives on from the Chippewa on down
of the big lake they call Gitche Gumee
Superior they said never gives up her dead
when the gales of november come early”

—–
COMMENT:
AUTHOR: Lee
DATE: 11/23/2007 09:53:04
I have always loved that song. Thank you for the history behind it.
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Every now and then….
DATE: 11/08/2007 12:52:13
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Letting go is not an option….
DATE: 11/06/2007 14:32:09
STATUS: publish
BODY:

The realization of a demise of a relationship tends to distress our daily lives and skew our ability to function in the norm. There is a notable marked decline of energy, a distinct lack of direction, an inability to focus,episodes of anger, resentment, and frustration… we tend to lash out at anything and everything that threatens to topple what small reserve we have left. There is a sense of detachment and withdrawal from the outside world. It seems everything becomes a struggle. I’m told it is common to feel emotionally overwhelmed and experience frequent, sometimes uncontrollable, emotional outbursts or to become “numb” with little expression of feeling. I have, of late, journeyed both ends of the spectrum and seem to bounce between the two from one moment to the next. As if just before completely losing it, my body shifts into an unfeeling mode…shock, if you will, where there is no pain, no hurt, no anger…complete apathy, until some action or thought triggers the floodgates to open once again.

In an attempt to deal with what has been handed to us, we sometimes try to avoid or deny our feelings. Turning the other cheek and professing we are fine when in reality we are the furthest from ‘fine’ that we could possibly be. Sometimes we react by obsessing or being preoccupied with what we lost, by withdrawing from others and retreating or by immersing ourselves into other relationships or work, and by trying to find a fix, using our addictions to numb the pain and escape the situation. These types of reactions haven’t worked for me, they just create deeper despair.

Loss takes time to heal from, and from my position as a submissive Woman that attaches deeply, such healing can take months even years. Augmented by the fact that sometimes there is no definitive moment of loss, no closure to be able to pinpoint exactly when said loss took place,in these circumstances I tend to wander aimlessly, hurt and lost, not being hardwired to accept defeat. I have a propensity to wait long periods in hopes that everything is all just a bad dream and not at all how it seems. I gamble against common sense, defying reality, convincing myself that it is some sort of test.

It is said, if you acknowledge the loss, focus on learning from your experience, and spend your energy concentrating on you, with time you will find yourself moving on. Whether this means you chose to remain single or enter into new romantic relationships, you will notice you feel differently than you did in the beginning and realize you are now doing things differently as well.

It is also said that significant loss and generates many strong feelings. Although experiencing these feelings are painful, frustrating, and unpleasant, it is in doing this that we begin to recover and let go.

Unfortunately,Thats where I get stuck…….letting go. Letting go acknowledges defeat ,defeat is failure, slaves can not fail…and survive intact.

—–
COMMENT:
AUTHOR: Lee
DATE: 11/06/2007 20:41:41
We dont know each other but our pain is the same and stems from the same source im guessing. Im so sorry.
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Could you possibly know….
DATE: 11/02/2007 07:45:51
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Could you possibly know that you would touch me so? Could you possibly know how much hurt I feel? does it show? do I hide it well? does it even matter? Could you possibly know how attached I had become? do you think at the same time I do? do you share those thoughts? do we look at the same moon…at the same time? does that star remind you of what was supposed to be reached for? do you feel the chill of the night like I do? do you know how much you meant?

I miss you.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Fade to black…..
DATE: 10/30/2007 12:39:09
STATUS: publish
BODY:
Slipping into a depression it seems, strangely what looked so optimistic just a few short weeks ago today appears to be an expansive black void. no sight, no sound, no warmth to be found. the silence within my head is deafening, and the wrenching pain in my chest is constant. Looking around I see nothing, I can touch nothing, as though one moment dancing in a field of daisies and the next spiraling into the abyss. I dont know what happened, what I did, or didnt do that changed things. I dont understand how one day there can be a brighter shade of light…and the next nothing. Tears flow easily on days like these, the torture of looking back, re reading trying to make sense of it all… trying to find somewhere where things changed, not even a cross word to be found… things just vanished so quickly I didnt even realize it had happened, my naievity, my optimism told me you were just busy, had things to take care of. my hope led me to believe that everything would be alright… my tears , a seriously delayed reaction held back by my belief that you wouldnt just walk away without a word. I still believe that. You’re just busy. My insecurities run rampant.
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: The Palette
DATE: 10/28/2007 11:39:08
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Please don’t bother me with

contented pinks, placid yellows, or

barren spotless whites.

I want only Your densest, most visceral reds,

thick sweltering purples,

jagged, scorching oranges.

I may just murder laxity tonight,

lest I will myself not to.

So please be my everything and don’t waste time

with the delicate sachet of tumbling petals,

or the sweet flutter of angel wings.

Let the midnight iridescence of Your eyes

blind mine to a subtle trance

with the magnetic suction of a vampire,

the engulfing odor of boiling sweat,

the archetypal pounding of pterodactyl wings.

Blackness will comfort the moment

when the breathing slows,

and the slow undulation of Your hips

becomes the palette of my surrender.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: One Touch, One Kiss, and Then the Abyss
DATE: 10/25/2007 18:45:24
STATUS: publish
BODY:

You avoid the daylight
and live for the night
penetrating my dreams
and now haunting my mind
thoughts of Your name
and face in my eyes
an evil lurker
seeking to find
Your next victim’s life pulse
oh,
will it be mine?

A fantastical figure
your obsidian eyes gleam
the coldness inside You
thus can not readily be seen…
making it impossible
to think rationally
to be in love with one so dark
oh,
can it be?

Outside, you’re so untouchable
Your reputation romantical
a Vampire’s mythical charms
pulled my womanly body
right into Your arms…..

Giving new meaning
the promise of eternity
but what will Your calculating demeanor
end up costing I shall see…

With Your kiss comes to me Your curse…
You steal my mortality
my soul no longer my own…
Your need burns inside of me
I could never leave now..
and so Your curse I’ll welcome
following You straight into to the Abyss..
I love you…

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Halloween Fun
DATE: 10/21/2007 07:50:19
STATUS: publish
BODY:

On this wicked Hallow’s Eve
My mind drifts ‘pon debauched thoughts; not naieve
I know just what’s in store for me.
Carnal lust; depravity.

Tonight I dress down, when others so fancy
wondering in anticipation; excited and antsy
knowing treat bag in hand, will bring much delight,
just how you will ”treat” me on Halloween night

I step to your door, a sensual minx
no candy I’m seeking, its erotic high-jinks
I’ll then ring your bell calling out “Trick or Treat,
it may not be sugary, but its still good to eat!”

With foresight to spare on this darkest of nights
having envisioned slaps, pinches,… spankings and bites
I knew that no panties would make access a breeze,
uplifting bustier, tight skirt, silk stockings to tease

A schoolgirl or nurse or maybe vampire
Or perhaps all three if you’re not gonna tire.
A private affair for those who are close,
Starts with a costume,maid wench or ghost.

A night, not for fright..but fear will abound
temptation depravity and sadism found
flesh welted;marked red, and begging so dire
building and coaxing and stoking my fire

You construct an inferno, raging within
promises unspoken of cardinal sin
I’ll beg you to beat me; set my flesh aflame
I’ll submit and surrender and scream out your name

You’ll own me, consume me, and take me as yours
I’ll be wanton; begging… more lustful than whores
You are my Master and I am your slave
our meeting dark;dirty and oh so deprave

Life never mundane when I’m at your feet
but getting to play openly is always a treat.
I’ll follow you, leashed, at the Halloween Ball
Your beast, whore, and cunt quite visable to all.

Your sensual vixen there for your pleasure
the gleam in your eye tells me of treasure
this night holds in store, thats yet to be found
a promise of eternity, with nary a sound.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Happy Birthday Darling!
DATE: 10/15/2007 12:00:24
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Well befitting the occasion I’ll post yet another horoscope.. this ones for You Edge, Happy Birthday, Love ….cant say I agree with all of this, but some of it has You pegged to a ‘T’. I hope this day, and this year… brings You everything You desire. You absolutely deserve it!

Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 23)–Let the games begin! Libra will try anything once. Twice to make sure they liked it. Three times to be absolutely sure. Do not touch a Libra’s head during oral sex…that may work with an Aries, but not here. Libras LOVE giving oral – They LOVE getting it , too. But don’t feel like they get enough…too bad, because they sure as hell are getting enough of everything else. Libras are not only mental but emotional creatures. Can you cook a bag of peas in a pot of cold water? You won’t be cooking anything with a cold Libra either. That’s the emotional side for you. But, beware, once your Libra is on fire, you will be consumed. Libra’s believe in living and fulfilling fantasies that they haven’t done in real life…which is rare because they have done almost EVERYTHING. They have no problem sploshing, in fact, bring a towel. Or two. Or three. To them, sitting in a pie COULD be fun. Porn? Not for a Libra! They HATE vulgarity. They are heavily exhibitionistic by accident. They are accident prone and they lose everything. Keys, bras, underware, track of time, condoms….they also accidentally end up in bed with people. Amazing how THAT works! Libra is ruled by the goddess Aphrodite. They are never just ONE sex. They can always feel what the opposite sex feels. Which is why they are rarely clingy, except in rare circumstances when they have been led on, then watch the manipulative side of the scales swing. They love to role play and play dress up. Who are they really? It depends on what day of the week it is. They believe that life is too short to date ugly people, for more than one reason. So if you are being shagged by a Libra, there is a good reason. Whether you are attractive physically, emotionally, mentally or have a fantastic sense of humor, there is always a reason for a Libra to be fucking you. They despise feeling like they are on a waiting list to get your attention…worse yet, feeling like they are your groupie. That won’t last long, then. They have already figured out HOW to destroy you…now they are biding their time to see how long until they throw YOU away…with nothing. But, if you get past all that, expect long luxurious nights of love making. Libra’s are also the romantic of the zodiac, they don’t just fuck. They are the Graceful Slut…but not slutty and yet accident prone. If you are going to fuck a Libra: Throw away your watch. Get mirrors. Lots of them. They have more vanity issues than a Gemini. Nothing is TOO kinky for them. They are the eternal Courtesan or Concubine. Libra’s require psychological penetration. Confidence and understanding must exist between the Libra and their mate. Thus, when mutual confidence and respect exists, sexual energy is exchanged and not wasted or worn.

And… Your very own Libra inspired Drink!

Come hither Dear Libra and I will tell you about yourself. You are the light hearted, charming, diplomatic that everyone likes. On a good day. On a bad, (when life is mildly discordant) well, let’s not even go there. No type A personalities here… Libras shun stress, like, virgin drinks. But credit given where credit is due, this sign trumps all the others at the art of flirtation. I wouldn’t be surprised if Eve were a Libra. Adam didn’t stand a chance. Which brings us to that ill-fated apple in the Garden of Eden. It’s sweet flavor and pleasing form connect it to the planet of love and fertility, Venus. Something about apples and tricks… wasn’t that what got Snow White? The apple has long been associated with countless aphrodisiacal tales. Extraordinarily beautiful flowers, highly fragrant blooms, enticingly sweet nectar… all traits of Venusian plants. Venus’ shining brilliance makes her the easiest planet to see from Earth, her beauty is obvious to all who gaze upon her. And once Libra sips this magic potion, it is sure to become the APPLETINI of his eye.

ORIGINAL SIN

INGREDIENTS:
- 3 oz freshly extracted apple juice (green or gold apples preferred–if using red, remove skin, unless you want a reddish hue to your drink)
- 2 oz simple syrup*
- 1 oz freshly extracted lemon juice (if you are using Granny Smith apples, then use a little less lemon juice)
- 1 1/2 oz gin
- slice of apple OR sugar to rim

INSTRUCTIONS:
Add gin, apple juice, simple syrup, lemon juice to shaker filled with ice. Shake mixture until container feels cold. Prepare Martini glass by rimming edge with sugar. Pour into glass and enjoy.

(Recipe created by Gwen Sutherland Kaiser)

*It is simple to make simple syrup. Add equal amounts of sugar and water into leak proof container and shake every twenty minutes until mixture is dissolved. Store in fridge.

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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 10/21/2007 16:41:15
Nice pic. I’ll bet I could tip those scales.
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——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: The Phantom of the Opera, Sarah Brightman and Antonio Banderas
DATE: 10/12/2007 07:13:25
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Phantom:
It’s me they hear

Both:
My/Your spirit and my/your voice
In one combined
The phantom of the opera is there
inside my/your mind

Chorus:
Is that the phantom of the opera?
Beware the phantom of the opera

Phantom:
In all your fantasies you always knew
That man and mystery

Christine:
Were both in you

Both:
And in this labrinth
Where night is blind
The Phantom of the opera is here/there

Christine:
Inside my mind

Phantom:
Sing, my Angel …

Christine:
He’s there,
the Phantom of the Opera . .

Phantom:

Sing my angel of Music!

Sing my angel

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Abriella’s Realization….
DATE: 10/09/2007 14:38:03
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Lulled by his soft tones and comforting warmth, she rested with her head against his chest drifting in and out of a dreamlike state, surroundings passing by in a surrealistic fashion… in her entranced state she did not notice that her paramour had no heartbeat.

She awoke languidly, a soft voice calling her up from her deep lethargy. Calling her name. She opened her eyes to see the stone-walled chamber, lit by a fire in a large fireplace and long black taper candles in brass sconces along the tapestry-covered walls. A tall cheval mirror stood off to one side, dusty from lack of use, though beautiful, antiquely ornate. The door looked heavy, oaken and the hinges were of thick cast-iron in a very old style she had not seen except in history books. A narrow window overlooked a moonlit courtyard far below; an English teagarden delicately traced in rosebushes. The bed beneath her was large and soft, covered in deep velvet down comforters and fluffy pillows. Above her rose the canopy, draped in dark burgundy velvet curtains. It was immaculately beautiful.

As she pulled herself up to sitting, she noticed that she was no longer wearing her street clothes, instead clad in a silken black gown that exposed much of her neck and cleavage.

She gazed around her in amazement and was met again by the Man’s dark eyes. With a start she pulled the coverlet attempting to cover herself. He was draped over a nearby high-backed chair, looking cool with a slightly amused grin. He was still dressed in just the white shirt, opened to the waist, tight sandy colored leather pants and high boots, his hair now falling freely over strong shoulders in midnight black splendor. He raised a high arched eyebrow, bemused. “Sleep well, my dear?” he drawled.

Now, fear closed her mouth. She could not speak for the constriction of her throat around her pounding pulse. She backed away across the bed, winding up with her back against the elaborate mahogany headboard, shaking her head and trembling.

He cocked his head, looking intrigued, and sat up straighter, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, his chin on his long, steepled fingers. Her lower lip quivered, even as the thought of running her fingers through his silken black hair crossed her terrified mind. She wondered idly what kissing those pale cruel lips would be like, and shook her head to clear her mind. This was insane! Her life was forfeit! What had she done? He didn’t move, but captured her eyes again, easy as a cat captures a mouse in a corner, and she felt a lump rise in her throat.

His eyes warmed, his brows knitting in sweet concern, his lips pursing slightly. When he spoke his voice was tender, soothing. “What frightens you so much, girl? I already said I would not kill you, unless you asked me to…”

“You’re a…a… vampire!” she gasped finally, tears streaming down her cheeks, her hands flying up to cover her exposed throat. She began to sob, terrified.

He nodded, his eyebrows raised, looking down with a slight smile, “Indeed, I am just that. But, I am also a man of my word. I promised that I would not kill you, and I hold to that. You wanted answers, and I will give them to you. But nothing is free; there will be a price. Not your life, mind. Just now, for saving your life, the price is: a kiss.”

Abriella’s eyes widened, her tears startled clean away. “A kiss? That’s it?”

A hungry look crossed his handsome face, and he cocked his eyebrow at her again. “For now,” he replied softly, “the more you ask, the more I take. Understand?”

She nodded slowly and stayed very still as though in the presence of a predator as he slinked across the bed to kneel before her. She closed her eyes as his arms came up around her and his warm lips pressed against hers. She willed her heart to stop it’s pounding, as she was sure he could hear it, feel it through her skin, and that it would get his attention like waving a red flag.

He pulled away slightly and looked into her eyes, whispering, “It’s not much of a kiss if only one party is doing the kissing, mio tessoro. Am I so horrible? I think I deserve a kiss for what I have done for you.”

She worried her lower lip with her teeth, stopped herself quickly for fear she should cause her lip to bleed, and tilted her head back slightly to accept his kiss again. He did not lean forward, only watching her expectantly. A chill coursed through her as she realized that he wanted her to kiss him now.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Imaginary Lover….
DATE: 10/08/2007 09:36:48
STATUS: publish
BODY:

His voice permiates the shadows
The ghost of fingertips slide over my form
My skin tingles and quivers at this silent touch
The breeze in my room becomes his breath in my hair
I see with my eyes closed
My invisible lover

A deep growl at my blushing cheeks
An imagined caress to my stomach
My mouth opens to receive his
I feel the brush of his consumption across my soul
I hear with out sound
My invisible lover

No skin touches mine, yet, I feel his fingertips
No words whispers in my ear, yet, I hear his voice
No mouth slides down my breast, yet I feel his lips
No body lies next to mine, yet I feel his presence within my soul
I know him
My invisible lover

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Autumn Tryst
DATE: 10/06/2007 07:12:14
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Come lay with me in the forest
crisp fallen leaves as our bed.
Come strip me of my clothes
and all the things I dread.

Let dappled sunlight dance across my breasts
as you taste my nipples, Sweet.
Tease them with your silken tongue
suckle them as your teat.

Lay my legs open wide
as I feel wet heat begin.
Kiss velveteen petals, ‘tween my thighs
and slide your tongue within.

taste of honey-sweet juices
as they flow down my ass.
Make me scream your name
as tongue carries out each pass.

The leaves beneath me moisten
pressed down upon the ground.
As I writhe in glorious release
my moans the only sound.

Come to me with glistening face
kiss me deep and long.
So I can taste what you have found
the scent of me still strong.

Come to me let my tongue swirl
to taste sweet pre-cum dripping.
Let me feel you harden in my mouth
as teeth and lips tease, nipping.

Let me suck you long and slow
and bring you pleasure sheer.
‘Til feeling overwhelms you
and the cumming is oh so near.

Then come and slide inside me
and feel my pent-up heat.
Feel tight warmth envelope you
on your shoulders place my feet.

Let me feel you deep inside me
please,take me hard and fast.
hips undulate together
please make this passion last.

And we’ll release in unison
as we moan each others name.
Let us explode together
become one and the same.

Steal my breath away
as I gush all over you.
while trembling shivers of pleasure
engulf all that we do.

And then move here beside me
while I’m lying down..
Juices drained and passion spent
on Autumn’s blanket on the ground.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Abriella’s intregue….
DATE: 10/04/2007 10:06:04
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Preface: A little something I’ve begun pulling from my mind and setting to text, inspired by that Special Someone and written in the most fictional sense (or is it?). I’m not, by a long shot ,a professional writer but I do hope that I can paint a picture for you, the reader, so that you might see… what I do. I’m not sure where this story is going yet, I’ll wing it as I go along. I do hope it entertains you enough to return and seek the continuations as I draw them from within. ~Fury~

The full moon gave the crisp fallen leaves a soft orange-ish cast; the chill in the air causing Abriella’s breath to cloud, her lungs inhaling the cold, feeling its icy grip cooling her within. She closed her mouth, breathing through her nose in dragonlike puffs, fighting to keep eyes in contact with the dark figure just inside the tree line.

He was tall, nearly six feet, wearing a long black duster, dark hair swept back into a ponytail that reached about mid shoulder on his back,tight breeches that appeared to be the color of sand and high black leather boots. He seemed out of place to Abriella, but his posture suggested that he was the only one at home with where he was, making it seem that everybody else was the anachronism. Half-lidded, slitted kohl black eyes held hers beneath the shadow of the trees. A cruel smile twisted his sensual lips, suggesting just the hint of extended canines.

His voice was low, seductive, accented and altogether mesmerizing. “You’ve followed me a long way to just stand there and watch, Abriella. You think I hold the answers… Well, maybe I do, but you will never aquire them standing out in the park like a fool. Come, follow me.”

Abriella shivered, not just with the cold. She noticed his breath didn’t cloud the air like hers did, the chill of the night didn’t seem to affect him, and the shadowed darkness didnt seem to slow him. Where she staggered and stumbled, he seemed relaxed and at ease. He paused momentarily, to let her catch up, his eyes seemed to soften a bit as he watched her trying to navigate the densely leaf covered ground, weaving over and around prominant root systems of the large oak trees. “You’ll never learn anything if you freeze to death, girl. I’m not going to kill you, if that’s what you’re afraid of.” He held out his hand in invitation to her. “Come with me.”

With a tremble, she reached out and took his hand. She’d expected cold, hard, unyielding flesh, and was met with warmth as the long fingers curled around her hand and gently pulled her closer. She felt resolve and fear melting away in this warm contact, her eyes drawn to his peering into their murky depths, and any will she may have had left was no longer stopping her in her compelled approach.

He removed and draped his long duster over her shoulders, leaving him with what appeared to be a long sleeved tunic in an off white color, belted snuggly at his waist, what appeared to be a riding crop tucked neatly into the belt and held snuggly against his thigh. Drawing her near to him, wrapping his arm about her shoulders. His warmth was soothing ,like sliding into a hot bath. A soft sigh escaped her slightly parted lips as she watched him wordlessly, while nearly swooning in his nearness. His body pressed against her felt hard, muscled, and smooth beneath the natural cotton shirt he wore, his hands large and strong where he held her shoulder, pinning her against him. Her breath hitched in her throat, and he smiled again, this time gentle, soothing, seductive. He hushed her quietly with a murmured “shhhh, come, I’ll take care of you” and gathered her up in his arms as though she were a child, and carried her through the late autumn night.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21)
DATE: 10/02/2007 20:26:17
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Right out the chute I am going to tell you…THEY LOVE TO BE SHAVED.

True love is being shaved.

Sagittarius love is being shaved by someone they love.

And they LOVE to travel.

They are constantly moving.

They are always packing and going somewhere. They are the outdoorsy type. Why fuck in a tent when you can be surrounded by Sequoias under a moonlit night and have sex? Sags will Fuck Everywhere! Most Sags flash body parts and are closet nudists. They will be the first to register for nude volleyball at the nudist resort. Don’t get me wrong, they have a TON of provocative clothing at home, but they like to be naked. EVERYWHERE.

They don’t know why its against the law to drive naked in a convertable especially. It just doesn’t seem right. Downright Anti-American to them. They are also bleeding heart causefighters. They believe that sex is a biological function amongst friends…why fight it when you can fuck it? A perfect night for them is to :

Talk. Fuck. Talk. Fuck. Go out and look at sea otters..Pick some flowers…Talk. Fuck. Laugh. Have a drink. Talk. Fuck. Dinner. Fuck. Sleep. Fuck and Fuck some more!

Male Sags have more fetishes than a female Sag. Foot fetishes…Lingerie…cross dressing…Female Sags are nature lovers: Do it in the bushes, Sex on the beach, in the ocean, hell behind the local laundrymat! Kinky? they Love Kinky. Wear that pirate getup for these girls, they’ll be on their knees in a heartbeat. They’ll dress kinky and skip the panties under a short skirt if you’re going out on the town, just to get you going, and I do mean going~ these girls want it all night long! Whipped cream, body oils and bondage,Licking and sucking, whatever it takes to keep the party going! . They believe in doing it and doing it often! fucking before the movie starts…, fucking at the theatre during the previews and maybe a quick blowjob on the way home.

Sag females love sexing up your whole body! Give them a chance, there won’t be a body part they haven’t sucked licked or fucked!You can touch them anywhere and they got hott cause they’re freaky like that! They love leg rubs and jacuzzis, this is because their thighs are a hot spot…They’ll be the ones holding you up fucking in the closet at your friends housewarming party at two in the morning. They are built for lot and lots of sex in any way shape or form, kinky or slow teasing, fast and hard or slow and easy~ if you want to get your freak on, Sagittarians are the way to go! None of the other signs love Sex as Much as a Sag!

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——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: don’t forget your prayers….
DATE: 10/01/2007 20:08:47
STATUS: publish
BODY:

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——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Tequila®
DATE: 09/30/2007 21:14:18
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
Do you suffer from shyness?
Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Tequila®.

Tequila® is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions. Tequila® can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you’re ready and willing to do just about anything. You will notice the benefits of Tequila® almost immediately, and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live. Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past, and you will discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living, with Tequila®.

Tequila® may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Tequila®. However, women who wouldn’t mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it. Side effects may include dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration, erotic lustfulness, loss of motor control, loss of clothing, loss of money, loss of virginity, delusions of grandeur, table dancing, headache, dehydration, dry mouth, and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all-night rounds of Strip Poker, Truth Or Dare, and Naked Twister.

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——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Daydreaming….
DATE: 09/29/2007 06:39:01
STATUS: publish
BODY:

I closed my eyes,
And I saw your face
I felt your touch,
Your warm embrace
I heard your voice,
Your whispers so
Your murmured sweet nothings
Why did you go?
You smelled so good,
It felt so right
I begged you please,
To hold me tight
You ran your fingers
Through my hair
Caressed my skin,
Your touch so fair
And then you pressed
Your lips to mine
My body quivered,
With chills divine
And just as I felt
I hadn’t a care,
I opened my eyes,
To find you not there
Was it all in my head?
Does my dream man exist?
I feel a great sadness,
as I ask myself this
Then as I look up,
Up to skies of blue
I see your sweet smile,
And I reach out to you
I see your dark eyes
Crinkle in smiles
And I know in my heart
Love overcomes miles
If you’d only reach back,
With your arms open wide
I’d be back in place
Right there by your side
You are the man,
Of which I had dreamed
I’ve waited forever,
Or so it had seemed
To share these feelings,
So pure, so true
Love frozen in time
This love… for you.
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Entry for September 28, 2007
DATE: 09/28/2007 11:33:42
STATUS: publish
BODY:

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——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Momsense…the William Tell Overture…
DATE: 09/28/2007 10:28:52
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Found this on YouTube , thought it was worth posting and sharing… I searched high and low for the lyrics and words in this and couldnt find them, so instead..My 10 yr old daughter Chelsea and I spent 3 hours this morning playing replaying winding and rewinding this song to get the lyrics…. this is as close as we can get… there are one or two things I’m still not 100% on but it’ll give you a real good idea anyway.

The Lyrics as per Diana and Chelsea:

So what I have done,
is I have uhh figured out what a mom would say
in a 24 hour period,
and I have condensed it to
2 minutes and 55 seconds
so strap on your seat belts, here we go…….

Get up now, get up now, get up out of bed,
wash your face, brush your teeth, come you sleepy head,
heres your clothes, heres your shoes, hear the words I said ?
get up now ,get up and make your bed!
Are ya hot, are ya cold, are you wearing that ?
Wheres your books and your notes, wheres your homework at ?
Grab your coat, and your gloves, and your scarf and hat…
dont forget you gotta feed the cat
eat your breakfast dont forget .. you know its the most important meal of all
take your vitamin so you will grow up one day to be big and tall
remember the orthodonist will be seeing you at 3 today
dont forget your piano lesson is this afternoon for you to play
no trouble, dont dally,but hurry, the bus is here
be careful, come back here ,did you wash behind your ears?
play outside, dont be rough, will ya just play fair?
be polite, make a friend, dont forget to share.
work it out, wait your turn, never take a dare.
get along.. dont make me come down there.
clean your room, fold your clothes, put your stuff away.
make your bed, do it now, we dont have all day
were you born in a barn,would you like some hay?
can you even hear a word I say ?
answer the phone; get off the phone
dont sit so close, turn it down, no texting at the table
no more computer time tonight!
your ipod’s my ipod, if you dont listen up!
where ya goin, and when you leaving, and what time do you think you’re coming home?
say thank you,please, excuse me, makes you welcome everywhere you roam
you’ll appreciate my wisdom someday when your older and your grown
cant wait until you have a couple little children of your own
you’ll thank me, for the counsel I gave you, so windily,
but right now I’ll thank you, not to roll your eyes at me
close your mouth when you chew, we’d appreciate
take a bite, maybe two of the stuff you hate
use a fork, do not burp or I’ll set you straight
eat the food I put upon your plate
get an “A” , get the door, dont get smart with me
get a grip, get over here, or I’ll count to three
get a job, get a life ,get a phd
get a dose of…
I dont care who started this
your grounded until you’re 36
get your story straight
and tell the truth for once for heavens sake
and…. if all your friends jumped…. off a cliff
would you jump too ?
if I’ve said it once, I’ve said it at least a thousand times before
that …..
You’re too old to act this way, it must be your father’s DNA
look at me when I am talking
stand up straighter when you walk
a place for every thing… and every thing must be in place
stop crying or I’ll give you something real to cry about
OH!
brush your teeth, wash your face, get your pj’s on…
get in bed, give me hugs ,say a prayer with mom,
dont forget I love you *kiss*
and tomorrow we will do this all again
because the mom’s work never ends
you don’t need the reason why
because, because, because, because…
I said so, I said so, I said so, I said so!
I’m the mom, the mom, the mom, the mom, the mom!
taaa daaaa!

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——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Backgammon, Anyone?
DATE: 09/27/2007 16:38:02
STATUS: publish
BODY:

One month ago today, fate seemingly dealt its hand. Placing two entities in the same place at the same time. Worlds apart and right next door, what unfolded from there can only be described as astonishing. I miss my Backgammon Buddy. Win or lose it didnt matter… after 30 smacks an ass goes numb anyway,right? so it was ‘ok’ to lose by a landslide. yeah… one month ago today… was a very good day.
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——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Entry for September 27, 2007
DATE: 09/27/2007 05:18:59
STATUS: publish
BODY:

The Mirriam-Webster Word of the Day for September 27, 2007 is:

fugitive • \FYOO-juh-tiv\ • noun

*1 : a person who flees or tries to escape; especially : refugee

2 : something elusive or hard to find

Did you know?

“Fugitive” was adopted into English as both a noun and an adjective in the 14th century. Both forms came to Middle English by way of Middle French from the Latin adjective “fugitivus.” “Fugitivus,” in turn, comes from “fugitus,” the past participle of the verb “fugere,” meaning “to flee.” Since its adoption, the noun “fugitive” has been used to identify a motley group of individuals: runaway slaves and soldiers, on-the-run criminals, exiles, refugees, and vagabonds. Eventually, it also developed a less commonly used extended sense for things which are difficult to find or pin down.

Its ironic that this should be todays word… just when I have been thinking so deeply about things for the past 24 hours.

For all my intellect intelligence and perception, there are still things I simply cant grasp no matter how hard I try.
For example why things have to be all…or nothing. It’s the nothing that bothers me. I liken it to a situation like this….. no…no, I’m not going to liken it to anything, no innuendoes, insinuations, imputations… this IS the situation.
Why is it, that when someone touches a visceral chord in someone else…ALL contact comes to a screeching halt, is it punishment? “Aha! You’ve stumbled into a forbidden Zone thussly you are EJECTED from my amusement park!” and where were the signs posted ‘go no further’ … Wait… there were no signs, because there were no posted limits, it just ….happened.

*sighs and looks up at what I’ve written thus far…its just not going in the right direction*

Let me try a different approach….

I feel like… a girl…looking in through the window pane of a socialite ball. watching as people who dont really give a shit for one another socialize and mingle….my invitation ….revoked… because I couldnt pull off the not giving a shit. I watch… that which I care for most….and those that dont care at all, laughing and joking and conversing with one another, discussing, chatting, just enjoying company.

why do you feed those who arent hungry, yet let the very thing you profess to care for….starve?

why do I feel, that because I cared…my invitation into your life… is revoked?
if I hadnt cared…could I have been one of the people at the party? would I be on the outside…looking in?

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: acta non verba…
DATE: 09/26/2007 09:19:36
STATUS: publish
BODY:

I feel…rather than hear.
can you feel it too?
do you feel the presence within?
haunting
persistant
recurrent

subtle intent displayed
inconspicuous acts
do you see them too?
a tender touch
a glance
a thought exposed through eyes.

words spoken
contradicted by actions
autogenic
instinctive
unmeditated
flowing without conscious thought

How can one hide
what their very soul
yearns to express?

Can you patch
the stone encasing your heart
as swiftly as it crumbles?

acta non verba-
actions….not words.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: You’re my Best Friend….
DATE: 09/25/2007 19:09:48
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Alright so anyone that knows anything about me knows I’m a huge believer in fate… often times I will balance my life’s decisions on ’signs’ from the ether world. If I have something that I just cant grasp one way or the other I simply leave it to the powers that be to prod me into the right direction. In this particular instance, I now know the answer but I dont know how to apply it.

There is a certain Special Someone that has touched me like no other. I’m sure he thinks I’m a complete lunatic for my tenacity in not letting things just rest. but when you feel something… something beyond human reason, a force beyond what would be considered normal, driving you to do something… you HAVE to follow it.

My logic is infuriating at times but really I just follow whats natural. Heres the situation as it unfolded this night.

I’ve been wrestling with a decision made by another, something I felt in my very core to be the WRONG decision, so tonight as I was driving in the pouring rain listening to the radio, it hit me… I’d let fate decide whether to keep the tenacity or let it go. no one can predict the radio… right? and fate PUTS things where it wants to before you even realize its happening, so in the middle of one song I simply said… out loud even… “alright… I’m giving it back to you, the next two songs that play will be indicitave of what I do.” so I waited for the current song to end… here are the results….

Queen

Ooo. you make me live
whatever this world can give to me
It’s you, you’re all I see
Ooo, you make me live now honey
Ooo, you make me live
You’re the best friend
that I ever had
I’ve been with you such a long time
You’re my sunshine
And I want you to know
That my feelings are true
I really love you
You’re my best friend
Ooo, you make me live
I’ve been wandering round
But I still come back to you
In rain or shine
You’ve stood by me girl
I’m happy, happy at home
You’re my best friend.
You’re the first one
When things turn out bad
You know I’ll never be lonely
You’re my only one
And I love
The things that you do
You’re my best friend
Ooo, you make me live.
I’m happy, happy at home
You’re my best friend
You’re my best friend
Ooo, you make me live
You, you’re my best friend.

and the second song…….

U2
See the stone set in your eyes
See the thorn twist in your side
I wait for you

Sleight of hand and twist of fate
On a bed of nails she makes me wait
And I wait without you

With or without you
With or without you

Through the storm we reach the shore
You give it all but I want more
And Im waiting for you

With or without you
With or without you
I cant live
With or without you

And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give
And you give
And you give yourself away

My hands are tied
My body bruised, shes got me with
Nothing to win and
Nothing left to lose

And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give
And you give
And you give yourself away

With or without you
With or without you
I cant live
With or without you

With or without you
With or without you
I cant live
With or without you
With or without you

So… it seems fate has spoken to me …Edge, I think it should speak to you too. I think you should seriously reconsider your decision. I love You.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: condamné à la mort
DATE: 09/25/2007 12:26:50
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Do you not want me anymore?

soft pools of emerald flecked with shards of copper
looked with trepidation into the dark hues of the Master
her question not asked without fear
the answer…the answer to her future, lay in the balance

again that quiet voice queried…
do you no longer desire your beast
my Master?

muscles in slave jaw trembled
as she bit back sheer terror
mind wracking dread
listening for his response

ears perked, every fiber of her being focused
reaching out into the darkness;the void
trembling in the silence
afraid,lost, confused

Death Row… the green mile
shivering in the cold
as if awaiting the Governors pardon
hoping beyond hope that a reprieve would be issued

Glazed orbs peering into the depths of his eyes
searching for answers
tears welling to cloud her view
before spilling down soft cheeks

Listening as he breathes
contemplates
his voice barely a whisper
heard booming within her mind

No, slave, I dont want you anymore

breath held as mind spins
He’s all she ever wanted,all she ever needed
did he not understand?
does he not know how a slave attaches?

no reprieve for his beast
no pardon
sentenced to death
away with her.

heart wrenched from her very chest
tossed with disregard
there is no moving on
there is no starting over somewhere else

executed.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Listen to the Rain….
DATE: 09/25/2007 05:38:12
STATUS: publish
BODY:

I am alone here, left with these tears
This rainy day brings me sorrow
it brings so much sadness
faster and harder the rain falls
To be unwanted
The rain unearths my hurt

I look outside and think of you
No sun shines for me
The rain reminds me of my heart
It doesn’t want me to know happiness
to be unwanted
the sadness nurtures my hurt

much sadness one can see in the rain
It speaks without any needed words
And listens to my deepest thoughts
These tears fall from my eyes for you
To be unwanted
The tears expose my hurt

The rain can’t tell you how I feel
Can’t tell you my deepest thoughts
My broken heart cries
This is the fear I have… to be without you
to be unwanted
my fears enhance my hurt

I am alone , left with these tears
can you hear the rain?
listen to the rain
as it falls in sadness to the ground
To be unwanted
the rain envelopes my hurt

It tells you what I can’t seem to
It tells you that I love you
You, who I love so deeply
I would give my last breath to see you
to be unwanted
my devotion drives my hurt

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Yours.
DATE: 09/24/2007 05:59:11
STATUS: publish
BODY:

I refuse to dwell
in the sea of negativity
I live instead within this dell
my focus, creativity

the minutes they tick slowly past
my fate it seems; it has been cast

I wait for One
Who’s cold as ice.
To come undone,
I pay his price

His touch I need upon my form
My soul withstands the violent storm

the highs and lows
of my emotions
tempered blows
to my devotions

I need You Master, cant you see?
Our coupling; Synchronicity

Our future written
preordained
we would be smitten
t’was ascertained.

Seek me out, oh Master, mine
Our lives were meant to intertwine

I fall before you to my knees
your touch I seek
my soul decrees;
“I’m Yours” I speak

take your beastie, hold her near
put aside that churning fear

hold me close
love me deep
with this prose
I’m Yours to keep.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Cirque D’Or
DATE: 09/23/2007 09:59:08
STATUS: publish
BODY:

The Golden Dragon Acrobats represent the best of a time honored tradition that began more than twenty seven centuries ago. Direct from Hebei, China, The company has traveled around the world to all 50 states and to over 65 countries on five continents, including performances at prestigious venues like the Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts and Caesar’s Palace in Atlantic City just to name a few.

Since these early times, acrobatics have evolved into many various forms of popular performance including dance, opera, wushu, and sports. However, the impact of Chinese acrobatics goes beyond the boundaries of the stage as it plays an important role in the cultural exchange between China and Western nations such as the United States.
The citizens of China continue to present their acrobatic art to the world today, hoping to portray the hard working nature of their people and the rich traditions of the Chinese culture.
With performers trained in the rigorous art of acrobatics since early youth, the troupe has garnered international acclaim.

The ancient art of Chinese Acrobats is an old and long running tradition that began in China more than two thousand years ago. Over its long and rich history it has developed as one of the most popular art forms among the Chinese people. While many historical records provide evidence for the development of Chinese Acrobatics as far back as the Xia Dynasty (4000 years ago), it is most commonly held that the art form did not become widely popular until approximately 2,500 years ago when it began to capture the attention of the country’s powerful emperors.

By luck my daughter and I will be attending this performance on Oct 11. I am thrilled to be given the oppertunity to see this show in person. Absolutely thrilled.

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: The Shift….
DATE: 09/20/2007 06:14:32
STATUS: publish
BODY:

snippets of time we pull out of the air,steal them
to be together, but not today it seems
I sense your anger
it frightens me
damn these insecurities
damn these fears

Yes,
I am afraid.

heart feeling wrenched; from my very chest
my soul trembling
in its secret place within me
so fragile; so afraid
damn these insecurities
damn these fears

Indeed,
I am afraid

tears spill to trickle down soft cheeks
mind flitting, from one thought to the next
my voice it seems,can not be found
terrified to speak; enrage you further
damn these insecurities
damn these fears

Yes,
I am afraid

I sit quiet as my mind tumbles over thoughts
senses heightened,perked, aroused
something shifts within
primal instinct takes the reigns
insecurities fade
fear becomes a driving force

I am not afraid
I am content

in this…mental shift
my focus turns to you
my desire to please you
heightened so much more
insecurities fade
fear recedes

no,
I am not afraid

I relish your anger
your fury, ignites me
you feel! you are alive!
your anger tells me so.
I am no longer insecure
I have no fear

Indeed,
I am not afraid

I watch
I wait
my love for you grows
I have become, your beast
you quell my insecurities
you control my fears

no,
I am not afraid

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Possession…. Sarah McLachlan
DATE: 09/19/2007 09:58:22
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Listen as the wind blows from across the great divide
voices trapped in yearning, memories trapped in time
the night is my companion, and solitude my guide
would I spend forever here and not be satisfied?

and I would be the one
to hold you down
kiss you so hard
I’ll take your breath away
and after, I’d wipe away the tears
just close your eyes dear

Through this world I’ve stumbled
so many times betrayed
trying to find an honest word to find
the truth enslaved
oh you speak to me in riddles
and you speak to me in rhymes
my body aches to breathe your breath
your words keep me alive

And I would be the one
to hold you down
kiss you so hard
I’ll take your breath away
and after, I’d wipe away the tears
just close your eyes dear

Into this night I wander
it’s morning that I dread
another day of knowing of
the path I fear to tread
oh into the sea of waking dreams
I follow without pride
nothing stands between us here
and I won’t be denied

and I would be the one
to hold you down
kiss you so hard
I’ll take your breath away
and after, I’d wipe away the tears
just close your eyes

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: The Haunted
DATE: 09/19/2007 05:01:23
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Taxes… a laymans explanation.
DATE: 09/12/2007 18:05:40
STATUS: publish
BODY:
I don’t really expect liberals to comprehend this but if I “only reach one.”

Liberals (socialists) believe in the “take from the rich, give to the poor) theory. It sounds great until you take so much from the rich or take away any incentive to be successfull that nobody tries anymore…then what happens to all the jobs and welfare programs? They go away.

“Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all ten
comes to $100. If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it would go
something like this:

The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing.
The fifth would pay $1.
The sixth would pay $3.
The seventh would pay $7.
The eighth would pay $12.
The ninth would pay $18.
The tenth man (the richest) would pay $59.

So, that’s what they decided to do.

The ten men drank in the bar every day and seemed quite happy with the
arrangement, until one day, the owner threw them a curve. “Since you are all such
good customers,” he said, “I’m going to reduce the cost of your daily beer by
$20.”Drinks for the ten now cost just $80.

The group still wanted to pay their bill the way we pay our taxes so the
first four men were unaffected. They would still drink for free. But what about
the other six men – the paying customers? How could they divide the $20
windfall so that everyone would get his ‘fair share’?

They realized that $20 divided by six is $3.33. But if they subtracted that
from everybody’s share, then the fifth man and the sixth man would each end up
being paid to drink his beer.

So, the bar owner suggested that it would be fair to reduce each man’s bill
by roughly the same amount, and he proceeded to work out the amounts each
should pay.

And so:

The fifth man, like the first four, now paid nothing (100% savings)
The sixth now paid $2 instead of $3 (33%savings).
The seventh now paid $5 instead of $7 (28%savings).
The eighth now paid $9 instead of $12 (25% savings).
The ninth now paid $14 instead of $18 (22% savings).
The tenth now paid $49 instead of $59 (16% savings).

Each of the six was better off than before. And the first four continued to
drink for free. But once outside the restaurant, the men began to compare
their savings. “I only got a dollar out of the $20,”declared the sixth man.

He pointed to the tenth man,” but he got $10!”

“Yeah, that’s right,” exclaimed the fifth man.

“I only saved a dollar too.
It’s unfair that he got back TEN times more than I!”

“That’s true!!” shouted the seventh man.

“Why should he get $10 back when I got only two?

The wealthy get all the breaks!”

“Wait a minute,” yelled the first four men in unison.

“We didn’t get anything at all.

The system exploits the poor!”

The nine men surrounded the tenth and beat him up.

The next night the tenth man didn’t show up for drinks, so the nine sat down
and had beers without him. But when it came time to pay the bill, they
discovered something important.

They didn’t have enough money between all of them for even half of the bill!

And that, boys and girls, journalists and college professors, is how our tax
system works.

The people who pay the highest taxes get the most benefit from a tax
reduction.

Tax them too much, attack them for being wealthy, and they just may not show
up anymore.

In fact, they might start drinking overseas where the atmosphere is somewhat
friendlier.”

For those who understand, no explanation is needed. For those who do not
understand no explanation is possible.
—–
COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 09/19/2007 05:38:44
Thats a good analogy. I’ve never heard it before, but I liked it.
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Finally an explanation of the Evolution of Mankind and Politics
DATE: 04/23/2007 06:58:18
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: I Miss Bill……
DATE: 04/06/2007 12:25:40
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: 17 Ways To Be A Good Liberal
DATE: 02/09/2007 09:23:50
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 02/09/2007 10:08:08
It probably is part of a conspiracy. Count me in.
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: What is a Republican?
DATE: 01/24/2007 20:52:55
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 01/24/2007 21:01:59
That was good.
—–
COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 01/24/2007 21:09:34
*grins* I thought so *winks*
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: The Democratic National Convention Schedule for 2008…
DATE: 11/27/2006 16:58:07
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Lansing, MI
DATE: 11/26/2006 21:06:00
STATUS: publish
BODY:

Bright lights over the Capitol: Fireworks explode over the Capitol in downtown Lansing after the lighting of Michigan’s official Christmas tree during the 22nd annual Silver Bells in the City celebration

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Happy Birthday Mama
DATE: 11/15/2006 21:11:59
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
COMMENT:
AUTHOR: t3h_Dumblydork/spawn (of Edge)
DATE: 11/16/2006 22:17:09
Geezus mom, did you have to make me bawl my eyes out. *wipes tears* Now my nose is even runnier. Thanks, mean mom.
Love you forever and always,
Your gonna-be-a-mean-mom-too-I-just-know-it Daughter.
—–
COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 11/16/2006 22:26:12
Heh, its hereditary…and inevitable kiddo. But yanno what… it all worked. I’m proud of ya Babydoll, you turned out just perfect. Love ya Peanut-butter.
All My Love,
Mama-butter
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Ted Nugent, PineKnob Michigan
DATE: 11/15/2006 18:34:17
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Sam I am…..
DATE: 11/13/2006 23:05:05
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 11/15/2006 00:49:16
That was funny.
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Colorgenics…try this!
DATE: 11/13/2006 21:59:11
STATUS: publish
BODY:

At this particular time you are feeling the results of extreme stress and you are seeking a ‘way out’ but you are pushing too hard. Obviously you need peace, tranquillity and contentment. Your temperament is such that you are hoping, unrealistically perhaps, that your desires will shortly be fulfilled (even if at this time you are not quite sure what those true aspirations may be!). Enough is enough. Nothing seems to be working out as you would like it to and it has got to the stage where you feel as if you can’t be bothered anymore. The way you feel is that it would be great if you could be cut off from everything and take it easy – be it only for a short time. In spite of the fact that you believe that your hopes and ideas are realistic, it is hard for you to accept that your needs and desires are misunderstood by almost everyone within your sphere of influenceand there is no-one to turn to or rely on. Your pent-up emotions and inherent egocentricity make you quick to take offence, but as matters stand you realise that you will have to make the best of things as they are. From every direction there appear to be unwarranted restrictions on your freedom of action and this is producing considerable stress. You’re really looking for independence and freedom from any restriction and therefore avoiding any obligations or anything which might prove hampering. You are being subjected to considerable pressures and you would like nothing better than to escape from them but you tend to lack the necessary strength of purpose to succeed in this. Whichever way you turn you are being frustrated. You need to be free to do your ‘thing’ in your own way. You wish to be left in peace… no more conflict and no more differences of opinion. In fact you just don’t want to be involved in arguments of any shape or form. All you want is for ‘them’ to get on with it – and to leave you alone

Amazingly accurate once again… go ahead, try it, I’d like to know if anyone else finds this eerily knowing.

http://www.paulgoldinresearch.com/cg/index.htm

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Chinese Astrology
DATE: 11/09/2006 10:20:37
STATUS: publish
BODY:

 

Place:Life

 

 

Stars:Treasury,Angel 1,Dissolute

 

 

 

 

Place:Parents

 

Stars:Lucky,Moon,Right Aid,Calamity

 

 

 

 

 

Place:Happiness

 

Stars:Warrior,Greedy Wolf

 

 

 

Place:Property

 

Stars:Sun,Big Mouth,Left Aid,Fiery Star,Pegasus

 

 

 

 

 

 

Place:Career

 

Stars:Minister,Festival

 

 

 

Place:Friends

 

Stars:Wit,Beam,Worrisome,Siren Star

 

 

 

 

 

Place:Travel

 

Stars:King,7 Kills,Intelligence,Abundance

 

 

 

 

 

Place:Health

 

Stars:Troublesome

 

 

Place:Wealth

 

Stars:Punishment

 

 

Place:Children

 

Stars:

 

Place:Marriage

 

Stars:Chastity,Army,Intellect,Angel 2,Belle

 

 

 

 

 

 

Place:Siblings

 

Stars:Misfortune

 

 

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: hmmmmm…
DATE: 11/07/2006 11:43:09
STATUS: publish
BODY:

even if its not true…sounds like a damn good plan!
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Two Wolves….
DATE: 11/05/2006 21:57:03
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 11/07/2006 11:07:26
Now I can’t eat because I don’t know whether to swallow to the left or to the right. Oh, wait. I’m conservative. That means I feed the right.
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: ok this one I can relate to… its hilarious
DATE: 11/01/2006 14:42:20
STATUS: publish
BODY:

A sexy woman went up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She

gestured alluringly to the bartender who approached her

immediately. She

seductively

signaled that he should bring his face closer to hers. As he did,

she gently caressed his full beard.

“Are you the manager?” she asked, softly stroking his face with

both hands.

“Actually, no,” he replied.

“Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him,” she said,

running her hands beyond his beard and into his hair.

“I’m afraid I can’t,” breathed the bartender. “Is there anything I can do?”

“Yes. I need for you to give him a message,” she continued,

running her forefinger across the bartender’s lips and slyly

popping a couple of her fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently.

“What should I tell him?” the bartender managed to say.

“Tell him,” she whispered, “there’s no toilet paper, hand soap, or

paper towels in the ladies room.”

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: A Man walks into a Bar…..
DATE: 11/01/2006 14:36:19
STATUS: publish
BODY:

A man walked into a very high-tech bar. As he sat down on a stool he noticed that the bartender was a robot. The robot clicked to attention and asked, “Sir, what will you have?”

The man thought a moment then replied? “A martini please.”

The robot clicked a couple of times and mixed the best martini the man had ever had. The robot then asked, “Sir, what is your IQ?”

The man answered “Oh, about 164.”

The robot then proceeded to discuss the ‘theory of relativity’, ‘inter stellar space travel’, ‘the latest medical breakthroughs’, etc…….

The man was most impressed. He left the bar but thought he would try a different tact. He returned and took a seat. Again the robot clicked and asked what he would have? “A Martini please.”

Again it was superb. The robot again asked, “What is your IQ sir?”

This time the man answered, “Oh about 100″. So the robot started discussing NASCAR racing, the latest basketball scores, and what to expect the Dodgers to do this week end?

The guy had to try it one more time. So he left, returned and took a stool. Again a martini, and the question, “What is your IQ?”??

This time the man drawled out ” Uh….. bout 50″.

The robot clicked then leaned close and very slowly asked,

“A-r-e y-o-u-r p-e-o-p-l-e g-o-i-n-g t-o n-o-m-i-n-a-t-e H-i-l-l-a-r-y-?
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: The only thing we have to Fear…is Fear itself.
DATE: 11/01/2006 09:16:07
STATUS: publish
BODY:

—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: All Hallows Eve Oct 31
DATE: 10/31/2006 07:40:32
STATUS: publish
BODY:

October 31, All Hallows’ Eve, was traditionally a continuation of the pagan/occult Samhain (Oct. 30) in Ireland. The Roman Catholic Church tried to Christianize the celebration by moving the Catholic celebration of dead saints to All Hallowmas (Nov. 1). However, the people continued to celebrate the pagan aspects of it the night before, on all Hallows Eve, or Hallowe’en. These included the divination practices intended to contact the dead. Even in Wicca and other “magick” religions today, Hallowe’en is recognized as a “power” day, when spells are supposed to be more powerful.
Oak trees were considered magical by the Celts, and the belief spread from ascribing these powers simply to oaks, to acorns and finally to all autumn nuts. Hence they were the “treat” of early trick-or-treaters. Orange and black were the colors used in Ireland to symbolize Hallowe’en/allhallowmas. Black represented death, and orange was used to remember the souls in the fires of purgatory or hell.
Jack-o’-lanterns were originally made of turnips and relate to the Irish folktale of a bartender and orchardist named Jack, who tricked the devil to climb an apple tree for an apple, but carved a cross into the tree after the devil had climbed, and the cross would cause his descent to be painful. (Other versions say that Jack tricked the devil into paying too much for drinks at Jack’s pub.) Jack supposedly died from choking on a pithy turnip, and he was condemned to wnder the earth as a ghost, carrying a coal from hell in a carved turnip, until the Last Judgment. In America, the pumpkin was found much easier to carve, and besides, it was orange–one of the All Hallows’ Eve colors.
Hallowe’en has become a recruiting tool for magick religions, and is known in the U.S. as National Magic Day by Wiccans and other practitioners of the occult.

Reformation Day is also celebrated on October 31, commemorating the day Martin Luther nailed 95 theses to the door of Wittemberg’s Catholic church. This day is celebrated by some Christians in Germany, and more recently in North America as an alternative to Hallowe’en celebrations
—–
——–
AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: The pumpkin as voluptuous sex object …
DATE: 10/30/2006 10:30:57
STATUS: publish
BODY:

In summary, the police  arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22-year-old white male, resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38p.m. on Friday.

Lawrence will be charged with lewd and lascivious behavior,  public indecency, and public intoxication at the Gwinnett County courthouse on Monday.  The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkinpatch he decided to stop.

“You know,  a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around here for miles. At least I thought there wasn’t,” he stated  in a phone interview.

Lawrence went on to say  that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin
that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his need.

“I guess I was just really into it, you know ?” ( no pun intended ) he commented with evident
embarrassment.  In the process, Lawrence apparently failed to notice a Gwinnett County police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until officer Brenda Taylor approached him.

“It was an unusual situation, that’s for sure,” said officer Taylor. “I walked up to (Lawrence) and he’s…just working away at his pumpkin.”

Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence. “I just went up and said, ‘Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?’

“He froze and was  clearly very surprised that I was there, and then looked me straight in the
face and said, “A pumpkin? Damn…is it midnight already…?’”

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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 10/30/2006 11:05:18
That was funny.
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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Samhain
DATE: 10/30/2006 07:24:01
STATUS: publish
BODY:

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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: IF YOUR LIFE WAS A MOVIE, WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE?
DATE: 10/25/2006 12:16:33
STATUS: publish
BODY:

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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Holding Your Own Boobs Magazine…..
DATE: 10/24/2006 20:43:43
STATUS: publish
BODY:

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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Your Touch……
DATE: 10/23/2006 11:16:14
STATUS: publish
BODY:

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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Entry for October 23, 2006
DATE: 10/23/2006 11:04:19
STATUS: publish
BODY:

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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Entry for October 21, 2006
DATE: 10/21/2006 12:25:01
STATUS: publish
BODY:

…..All across this country there are thousands and thousands of households that are guilty of the most heinous crime: Pumpkin Mutilation.

…..Pumpkins who have been subjected to any of these procedures should be treated with understanding and compassion, not left outside in the cold and rain subject to being physically assaulted by local ruffians. These procedures are being performed on Pumpkins as young as six months old. At this age Pumpkins are incapable of making independent decisions about their life. This is a tradition that is being forced on Pumpkins who don’t even understand what tradition is yet.

…..Pumpkins are experiencing this unnecessary painful procedure all in the name of tradition. This procedure is part of Western culture. The practice is defended on one main account, because it is a religious tradition. Yet, in reality this tradition is not based on any religious literature or history. In fact, the truth is that the original Jack O’ Lantern was a hollow turnip, not a Pumpkin at all.

…..If the physical and mental effects are not devastating enough, the conditions that this surgical operation occur under are enough to make anyone cringe. Many families are not technologically advanced in the medical area and this is a serious problem when it comes to Pumpkin Mutilation. The harsh reality is that the people who perform this procedure on thousands of Pumpkins each year are not medically trained. These play doctors use whatever is available to perform this surgery. If that means using a broken bottle, spear, razor blade, or even a rusty kitchen knife, then so be it. On top of that these play doctors aren’t even cleaning their tools effectively.

…..The ugly truth is that Pumpkins are being mutilated for commercial ends with no thought, whatsoever, to the welfare of the Pumpkins. There are rituals that denote and strengthen the end of summer festivals in our culture and society that do not involve pain and permanent physical damage to the innocent Pumpkins.

…..Pumpkin Mutilation is practiced because of wrong ideologies and misunderstood myths that are fuled by a lack of education for a majority of the American population. How can one interfere with something as sacred as a tradition? Once a tradition is established it is up to the members of that society to keep it alive. Traditions should be based on quality beliefs not on the confusion of the New World Pumpkin with a practice which originally targetted the lowly Turnip!

…..This tradition is out-dated and is completely based on ancient false ideologies. This tradition has no religious history involved; therefore, it is not sacred or necessary for preserving of our cultural heritage. Where does society and the individual draw the line in deciding what is a sacred tradition and what is down right morally wrong?

…..Stop Pumpkin Mutilation Now!

�

UPDATE:

The Pumpkin Mutilation across this country has not been stopped. Here’s a recent update from the Founder of the Society:

It's still a serious problem, and we're quickly coming to that
time of year again when horrid things are done to Pumpkins. What's worse
is that since the founding of the Society for Prevention of Cruelty to
Pumpkins, we've found some even darker truths behind the plight of those
innocents. 

Did you know that almost none of the money made on the commercial
exploitation of Pumpkins goes back to improving the conditions of the
Pumpkins themselves? It's true! In fact, what health care there is to be
had generally goes not to the Pumkins but rather to their cruel masters.
So, where is a mutilated Pumpkin to turn for desperately needed health
care? Without insurance, without even a minimum wage!

Not only this, but most Pumpkins live in complete squalor. It is
not uncommon for Pumpkins to be kept confined to something akin to a
prison yard, with no roof over them and forced to sit for days on end on
the bare dirt ground.

As if this were not bad enough, what do you think happens to
Pumpkins that either don't meet certain standards for body shape, size or
skin color? Worse, what do you think happens to Pumpkins that become
injured before they are ripe for mutilation? It's the sad truth that these
poor Pumpkins are, more often than not, simply killed! This goes beyond
simple prejudice into the realm of Eugenics like that practiced in Nazi
Germany!

I wish I could say that there has been progress made, but the
Society faces amazing resistance to change on something that is so
obviously wrong. Frankly, I'd like to think that it was due to
indifference, but the most damning fact I've discovered is that people
continue this insane tradition because they enjoy it!

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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: The Cats in the Kettle at the Peking Moon
DATE: 10/18/2006 18:23:55
STATUS: publish
BODY:

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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Where do you stand on the issue of robot sex
DATE: 10/17/2006 11:49:08
STATUS: publish
BODY:

This topic seems to be coming up a lot lately. It’s assumed that “the Japanese” are working feverishly at making this dream a reality. Personally,  taki thinks that Japan will want to realize their shared cultural vision of the Giant Battle Droid before they begin work on sex robots.
The way it is now they are looking around for any excuse to build the Giant Battle Droid.
Example: Japan has an aging population and they don’t want to bring in foreigners to care for them. The solution: robotic armature with superhuman strength. Someday soon the elderly in Japan will be encased in massive steel droids – lumbering off to buy noodles or get their hair tinted. The message is clear: when in Japan, be extra nice to old people. 
taki suspects that the real advances in recreational sex robotics is being made right here in the good ole US of A. Probably California. Somewhere between Silicon Valley and Hollywood is the experimental lab for this ambitious project. Some offshoot of Disney animatronics, possibly. Spearheaded by George Lucas.
Untold billions will be made by those who can make this happen. It may be assumed that China is developing it’s own sex robot industry. Expect a sort of space race between nations to get the first prototypes to the world market. Can boycotts be far behind?
Would you consider robot sex? What if it was Really good and cost, say, twenty bucks?
Most guys, if not all, would go for it after a few beers. Admit it. taki can’t speak for all women but if they made one that looked like Brad Pitt, and they would, taki would be first in line. taki is old enough to remember the first video game: Video Pong. The first models will be kind of like Video Pong. Simple, mindlessly entertaining but not a whole lot of fun. They may even make the same sounds. Beep – boop – Beep — boop. Consider the advances in video games since then and apply it to this emerging industry. Makes you think. What do you think?
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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: snikkers n giggles n laughs
DATE: 10/17/2006 09:04:38
STATUS: publish
BODY:

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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 10/17/2006 09:19:17
That is even worse than mine. Hard to believe.
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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Monday, Monday, cant stop that day….
DATE: 10/16/2006 14:07:43
STATUS: publish
BODY:

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COMMENT:
AUTHOR:
DATE: 10/16/2006 22:05:02
Have we really tried to stop it? Maybe if we all make a concerted effort we could do something about it.
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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: Whats next? First Pepsi Baptist Church??
DATE: 10/12/2006 07:04:12
STATUS: publish
BODY:

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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: What if I broke into your house?
DATE: 10/12/2006 06:54:03
STATUS: publish
BODY:
Recently, large demonstrations have taken place across the country protesting the fact that Congress is finally addressing the issue of illegal immigration. Certain people are angry that the U.S. might protect its own borders, might make it harder to sneak into this country and, once here, to stay indefinitely. Let me see if I correctly understand the thinking behind these protests.

Let’s say I break into your house. Let’s say that when you discover me in your house, you insist that I leave. But I say, “I’ve made all the beds and washed the dishes and did the laundry and swept the floors; I’ve done all the things you don’t like to do. I’m hard-working and honest (except for when I broke into your house).

According to the protesters, not only must you let me stay, you must add me to your family’s insurance plan, educate my kids, and provide other benefits to me and to my family (my husband will do your yard work) because he too is hard-working and honest, except for that breaking in part).

If you try to call the police or force me out, I will call my friends who will picket your house carrying signs that proclaim my right to be there.

It’s only fair, after all, because you have a nicer house than I do, and I’m just trying to better myself. I’m hard-working and honest, um, except for well, you know.

And what a deal it is for me!!

I live in your house, contributing only a fraction of the cost of my keep, and there is nothing you can do about it without being accused of selfishness, prejudice and being an anti-housebreaker. Oh yeah, and I want you to learn my language so you can communicate with me!

Why can’t people see how ridiculous this is? Only in America….
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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: A Letter From Grandma…..
DATE: 10/12/2006 06:30:38
STATUS: publish
BODY:

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AUTHOR: gataki_is_feral
TITLE: The Death of Common Sense
DATE: 10/07/2006 18:23:04
STATUS: publish
BODY:

 

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